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tankh21's picture

This weekend DH has the skids oh joy!! I am still going to stick to my plan of not cooking for SS any longer. I have told my DH several times that I will no longer be cooking for SS anymore since the last incident. I hope my stress level will go down because of this but who knows.

Summer is coming up as well and DH will have the skids for a whole month in June. SS right now is eating us out of house and home when he is there. I told DH that he is going to need to talk to him and tell him that we are buying groceries once a week and that he needs to make it last because I am not going back to the grocery store because he ate everything. I get it the kid is a growing teenager but he needs to learn some self control. He wastes food all the time as well.

A few days back BM and SS texted DH asking him to teach SS how to drive. This kid is 13 about to be 14. My first thought was BM is trying to bait my DH. I told him the legal age to drive is 15 years old with a learner's permit in our state and also if BM wants him to learn so bad then why doesn't she teach him in her brand new BMW. You would think she would want her precious snowflake to be safe when he first learns to drive.

DH has a truck and it's even hard for me to drive. I just told DH what I thought and he said yeah you are probably right I am being baited. Finally DH you are listening to my opinions.

Comments

DaizyDuke's picture

It doesn't take over a year to learn how to drive and that's what your damn learner's permit is for.  Hope your DH stands firm with a big fat no to that idiotic request.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Plan to be out of the house well in advance of dinner. Come home AFTER the usual dinner time...with your own food.

Unless you live in a farm area where SS can drive the truck on your property, DH should NOT be teaching SS how to drive until SS has that Learner's Permit AND DH sees it for himself. I don't know about your BM, tank, but I wouldn't trust BioHo for a millisecond.

ESMOD's picture

Yep...we let my skids drive from the time they could reach the pedals but on our 65 acres only.

lieutenant_dad's picture

Stop nagging your H. No, that is NOT me saying that I think you are the cause of the problems. However, these problems presented have NOTHING to do with you.

Buy a weeks worth of food. If SS eats it all, H can go buy more. If there is no food in the house for you, either go out to dinner or buy enough for yourself. Take it out of his spending money or his savings if you have to. However, this doesn't impact you directly. You are an adult; you can go get yourself more food. You are FREE to do as you please. So leave it to H to handle.

Same goes with cooking. Just don't do it. Cook for yourself or take yourself out. Or Cook something YOU want, and if the kids don't want it, your H can handle it. If your H gets mad, just calmly walk away. No need to nag and remind him.

Regarding the car, if your name is on it, get it removed. If he lets SS drive it, that's on him. H can pay the fines; he can pay an Uber every day if he loses his license for letting SS drive. He can pay to get his car out of impound.

You are NOT his mother. You CANNOT expect him to do things just because you tell him to. If he doesn't want to do them, you're just going to talk until you are blue in the face and frustrate yourself. Your power comes from determining if you want to handle the consequences of his actions or not. You CANNOT change him, but you CAN determine if you want to live with his choices and attitude toward it.