The "Promise Necklace"
I have to share SO and my good laugh with SS in town visiting!
A couple of weeks ago we were trying to get BM to respond to ANYTHING relating to SS. She absolutely refuses to co-parent in any way shape or form. We send an email about medical information and one of the things we asked was about the HPV shot that is now being given to boys. We point out that we see via social media that SS13 is "dating" every girl in town. It's a small town, so it doesn't take long for him to go thru every girl in his grade throughout the school year. We were also told by SS that his 1/2 sister was allowed to have boys sleep over her SR year of high school. --- So after we pointed those things out SO stated that he would like to have a discussion about the shot for SS. BM was LIVID 
The email response was along the lines of "don't make accusations on things you don't have proof of and I am raising my kids to make better choices than I did" (BM had her oldest her SR year of HS).
SS shows up with this giant cross and chain around his neck. I asked him last night if he was a blood or crypt- yanno thug life? Just joking with him, he started laughing and said no... it's a promise thing my mom made me do so I don't have sex before I get married. I laughed and said so where are you going to put the necklace later when that goes out the window- we was like.. yeah, but she leaves me alone if I wear it. I asked when she gave him that and he was like 2 weeks ago. --- SO and I lost it! That would have been just a couple of days after the email! This woman is so ridiculous!
- justmakingthebest's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Or... fancy this... Instead
Or... fancy this... Instead of some silly necklace they'll just throw aside... We teach them morals... Just an idea.
Gosh I would be pissed too! trying to discuss what's going on with BM and then she sends him back with a stupid necklace? Because that's going to do ANYTHING???
So and I aren't fools, we
So and I aren't fools, we both had premarital sex and sex in high school. We aren't going to bury our heads in the sand over our kids having sex. We preach to all of them to be in love. Make sure that you value the person enough that even when you break up- because at a young age you will, that you won't regret sharing yourself with them. Also- CONDOMS!! Use them!! All the time, everytime for everything! Condoms, condoms, condoms!
SO and I live together, we arent married. BM and her BF live together and aren't married. My kids dad married their stepmom when she was 7 months preggo. I mean, seriously sex in society today isn't "wait for marriage". We just don't want to be grandparents before we are even 40!
If I don't have my own bio, I
If I don't have my own bio, I'll be an empty nester by 40, LMAO.
I know lots of kids do it, it's smart that you're at least teaching them about ways to avoid getting pregnant. That's HUGE. And they might regret. I mean how many of our DHs on here probably regret doing things with BM? So I'm glad you're teaching them all that. Personally I waited, that's not what I plan to teach the skids though, I'm going to teach them the difference between love and lust and to be SURE they know it's what they want. Morals. May not be completely black and white, but if they understand the consequences, it might help them make smarter choices later.
We don't condone sexual
We don't condone sexual activity in minors but I won't pretend that wearing a giant cross is going to keep girls away, or him going after them. That is just silly. In our house we are searching for the balance of morals, respect (yourself and your partner), and protection.
That's how it should be.
That's how it should be. Sorry BM is making it more difficult with whatever she has going on there.
Plenty of kids have good
Plenty of kids have good morals AND sex. It's pretty ignorant to think a vaccine that prevents CANCER is somehow immoral. SMH these people. It's always the careless breeders who have a problem with reproductive health care.
But he has a giant cross- I
But he has a giant cross- I am talking it would scare the crap out of vampires... so he is good now right?? *good*
Do you have to get her
Do you have to get her consent to have him get a vaccine? Just because he has made this promise now.. the vaccine will help him prevent a potential issue in the future.. for example, even if his one and only wife has had a history... he would benefit from the protection the vaccine offers.
I might be tempted to just get it for him like you would any other vaccine for tetanus etc.
We actually have a
We actually have a peditrician appointment for him locally on Thursday to rule out the latest BM created disease that she said he has but won't tell us his doctors name. We might do that...
Teens are going to develop a sex life... it is natural
However, being responsible in how they develop that sex life is part of effective parenting. Morals are key, character is key, and using one's head is key... the one with a brain by the way.
We always were very clear in our conversations with SS regarding sex. He is a product of an unwed teen pregnancy and his mom was very clear with him how good choices return an easier life. She was clear that she did not regret having him but it would have been far easier if she had waited to have him until she was able to support and care for him.
I was more blunt and would have him repeat two key messages before he left on a date or outing with a group of his friends.... "No glove no love!" and "Wrap it before you tap it!"
He would grumble about it... but he would repeat the messages. He and I would kid about it to keep the topic somewhat light hearted but I always made it clear that I wasn't kidding about using his head, treating his dates with respect, and if he was going to have sex he needed to be responsible about it.
Apparently the combination of his mom's example and my messages seemed to have worked. He had a buffet of young women very interested in him but never partook of their offers. Now, he did come out to his mom and I a few years later so that explains a lot of his HS actions but according to several conversations he has had with his mom and I over the intervening years he had no intimate relationships until he was into his early 20s though he had ample opportunity.