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Why is it expected???

baseballgirly's picture

Submitted by baseballgirly on Tue, 09/04/2012 - 5:56pm

I know that everyone loves their own child more than others, but....

why do all parents think they can plop a stranger into your life and expect you to love them like they are your own!?!?!??

I have a dog and I don't expect everyone to love him like I do!!! He's MY dog!! Not theirs!!! I don't think it's much different with kids except kids are a bigger pain in the ass because you can't lock them in a kennel when they're pissing you off!!! Wink

Parents, ALL PARENTS... Mothers and Fathers, need to understand that they need to focus their love on their children and not try to force others to love their kids too. It's not natural. If a relationship comes out of it between the Significant other and the kids, that's great. If not, oh well. It shouldn't be expected.

Comments

Frustr8d1's picture

Submitted by Frustr8d1 on Tue, 09/04/2012 - 6:12pm

Hopefully, in my case, DH doesn't see SD9 as a reflection of himself. If he does, he's an ill-mannered, pathological lying sociopath!

Bex_S's picture

Submitted by Bex_S on Tue, 06/25/2019 - 10:08am

I know right? We as humans have barely evolved to the point that we don't kill another female's infant that 'invades' our home. Most other species kill the 'previous' offspring, so it's a perfectly natural, instinctive reaction to feel revulsion towards SKs; after all, in a natural sense, they're taking from your offspring and reducing their chances of survival. So how the hell are we expected to have love spring eternal for someone who to start with, is a complete stranger, not to mention in most cases (especially mine) a carbon copy of BM. If you love your SK it's a relationship that has to be built up. You can't fall instantly in love with a child that is not in the slightest bit related to you, and it's unrealistic to think that you can. Yet we're evil step-parents because we don't instantly love someone else's child...a permanent reminder that your partner once shared a life with someone else, and shared the wonderful experience of having a child together with someone else before you? An almost permanent connection to a toxic person that is only still in your partner's life because of the child? It is unnatural, but we take this child on despite this, yet we're dragged through the dirt like we're evil. The child has a basic right to be taken care of if they're in your home, but to be chastised for not loving that child like one you birthed yourself is completely unfair.