We received from the attorney his response to BM's attempt at increasing child support while SO is on unemployment. Previously SO made 80k per year, BM made 50k per year. SO was required to pay her $1250.00 a month for child support despite having the children 50% of the time. The attorney filed it as an emergency change in financial support, the hearing on it is next Wednesday 05/04/11 with a magistrate.

Currently according to BM's financial affidavit she makes 52k a year. While on Unemployment SO is making $14,300.00. According to Florida guidelines you add the two incomes (66,300) and devide in half (33,150) as the children are entitled to live at each house under identical living conditions. It appears for while SO is on Unemployment, BM will owe him a little over $1500.00 per month in child support.

Something tells me she is not going to be happy, first subtract the $1250.00 from her budget that she had been receiving from him, then subtract another $1500.00 a month. I do not know of a lot of 'single parents' that can afford a $2750.00 hit to their monthly budget.

SO's income is not likely to increase for at least six months if not longer. He has been approved through the State of Florida's Unemployment compensation for a school program in which the state assists him in getting schooling to obtain a degree (Associates) to better his chances of getting a well paying job. This assures him of Unemployment Benefits for the next two years. Government grants will pay for most of his schooling, student loans the remainder. Yes, the schooling is necessary as the construction industry in Florida is nearly non existant, the economy is not recovering enough to put back to work all of the people that were laid off due to the housing market taking a dive.

SO's parents were here last evening and his mother suggested he and the children moving in with me to conserve money. I explained to her that our relationship has not advanced to the point in my opinion of moving in, and that in my opinion moving in together under a financial strain for him will nearly guarantee that the relationship would soon sour. She agreed, her son has too much pride, he is already upset that he can not afford the child support he had been paying and that BM is now going to have to pay him. If we added in myself paying all the bills I do not think his pride would be able to withstand that adjustment. And it would be all of the bills, including his schooling. Fafsa goes off household income. In which case my income would be included, which would negate all of the government grants he just received to pay for his schooling.

A few months ago I encouraged both children to get involved in activities after school. I believe they help children mature and become independant, fss13 chose wrestling and baseball, fsd16 chose dance team and drama club. I explained to SO that the kids entered these activities under my urging and it would not be fair to them to require them to stop due to a lack of finances from either he, BM or both. I have volunteered to absorb the cost of the extra curriculars so the kids can continue them. Up to and including giving the children gas money to be able to make it to the practices, paying for trips for competition if necessary, uniforms etc.

SO has consolidated his bills as much as he can. He had few credit cards and paid those off out of his savings. His work truck and trailer he traded in on a small car that gets far better gas milage and the payment has dropped over $400.00 a month. His final act with his savings is paying first month and security on an apartment for him and the children, the rent on the apartment is $300.00 a month less than what his rental home was and water comes included (in the house it was a separate bill) which will save him appox. an additional $50-$60 a month.

He is required by divorce degree to cover the children on insurance, his application for medicaid for them was turned down, due to BM having the ability to put the kids on her insurance. That I am sure will be brought up in the hearing Wednesday, that she will need to cover them and the additional money it costs her will be taken off the amount of CS she will need to pay. I can not add the children onto my insurance as we would have to be married to do so, and his only other option is 'low cost healthcare' through the state, which due to BM's income is in reality, not low cost. It would be far cheaper for her to add the children to her employers health insurance.

Currently he is eligible for food stamps, but if BM is made to pay CS then his income would be too high to qualify for them any longer, and it is not a benefit he is keen on collecting.

While I know he has gone out of his way to conserve cash outlay, make a new budget and stick to it, he is still beating himself up mentally over not being able to provide for his kids. Does anyone have any idea how to bolster him up and get him to see that he is doing all he can and that CS is supposed to work in both directions, he pays if he earns more, she pays if she does? In his mind he is the man he is supposed to provide, no if's, and's or but's.