So SS ran out in April, and BM took him. BM called in less than a month begging SO to pick up SS because she couldn't handle him. SO agreed, and BM said she had been wrong to let SS run to her to escape the rules with SO. SS stayed about 7 weeks, then ran to BM again - having prearranged it with her. SO has now detached from both of them, telling BM that since she and SS proactively went behind SO's back to plan this really bad decision (BM can't provide him with the structure he needs, not even his basic needs are guaranteed to be met with her), that BM and SS are on their own.

This was about 10 weeks ago. I joined this site shortly thereafter.

I've blogged about it a lot, but that's the summary. SS looks like hell, has a nasty attitude, and is acting like a punk and experimenting with gang activity including god knows what. BM called crying in July saying she couldn't take it and wanted to abandon SS here and return to their home country. SS claims he wants to stay here to finish school. Well, she didn't do that. She called again crying about three weeks ago saying SS had been picked up by the police and she couldn't take it with him anymore. And now she's called again, back to her original story - I can't take it with him, I'm going to leave and leave him here.

SO told her the same thing he's told her since the day SS left the second time - we're not going around this circle a third time. He left, he was given a second chance, he didn't appreciate that and he left again. We're not going to repeat this cycle. So she'd better take SS with her, or SS had better have some plan of his own.

SS doesn't even bother to contact SO. He communicates through BM. SO feels that if SS has something to say to him, SS can call him or come to the house instead of hiding behind his mother.

Apparently BM called this afternoon. I half expected SS or the two of them to be on the doorstep when we got back from food shopping, but thankfully they weren't.

SO softened just a little bit - he said that the only way he would even think about allowing SS here was if SS approached SO himself, not through his mother, and displayed an entirely different attitude, and then backed it up. And then SO would think about it.

Before this he just said no way in hell.

I just wait to see what will happen next. (sigh)

L