My husband and I have been married for 3 months and lived together for a year and a half prior to the wedding. Since his divorce (3yrs before we got together), his ex has tormented him regarding "child support". To give a little back story, my husband's ex left him and their two children. When she said she wanted a divorce, he helped her move out, find an apartment, etc. He has had custody of the kids ever since. She has them every other weekend and occasionally one night during the week, but only during the school year because that mid-week visit in the summer puts a kink in her summer fun. "Child support" was agreed upon at $1000 per month and would become alimony when the youngest turned 18. My ex has never paid this late and has even given her additional money when they first divorced to set up her car insurance! This was an agreement that they both came to because she did not want to wait to receive any of his retirement money nor did he want to pay her any of it. When the ex found out that she would have to wait until the state released her "support" money (which could be up to 10 days after the 1st of the month), she talked my husband into agreeing to make payments directly to her, bypassing the state. Big mistake.

She has used this against him ever since. Before we were married, my husband banked at the same bank as the ex. Once we married, we closed that account. Because he is such a nice guy, my ex would deposit the "support" check into the ex's account when he would be at the bank doing his own business. Since we were closing the account at their mutual bank, he told the ex (two weeks before we closed the account) that he would no longer be able to deposit her check and would hand deliver it to her on the Friday's that coincided with her visitation with the kids. She flipped out and told him that it was his responsibility to get that money to her and that he better get a lawyer because she could say all of the previous payments were a gift and that he had not paid 3 years worth of "support". My husband tried to reason with her, but anyone who has to deal with a crazy ex will tell you that you simply cannot reason with them. When my ex told me this, I told him "enough is enough" and that we were not going to let her manipulate or threaten him/us anymore. So the next day, we set up an appointment with our lawyer to set up an income deduction order where his employer would deduct the "support" money directly from his account and send it straight to the state where they would disperse the funds to the crazy ex.

Two days later, crazy ex calls to apologize. My husband explained that he accepted her apology but that we were proceeding with the change. Crazy ex thought this was ridiculous and we would be spending a ton of money when all he had to do was deposit her check for her. My husband told her that since she threatened him, he would proceed because he did not want to be in contempt.

Fast forward to a month later. The income deduction order was completed, signed by both parties (crazy ex and my husband), and signed by the judge. His employer began deducting the funds and as per the court order, they were deposited with the state prior to the first day of the month. Was that good enough for crazy ex? Nope! She called on the first asking where was her money. My husband told her, talk to the state. She accused him of being in contempt of court because she did not have the funds in her hands on the first. It is now the 4th day of the month. She still has not received her funds because according to the state, she will receive the money 72 hours after he is required to pay it. She even told him that he had to pay her directly because she hasn't received her money from the state, when it clearly states on the income deduction order that he is NOT to pay her anything once the deductions were taken by his employer. She is FUMING mad. She has called him multiple times, calling him every name in the book and told him that he is listening to "outside influences" (which I take to mean me). She has sent him harassing text messages, telling him how much she hates him and "what he has done" to her.

As the "outside influence", I have little experience dealing with a harassing ex, having had to do so myself until mine remarried, I assisted my husband in forwarding the voicemails to a tape recorder and forwarding the text messages to his email so that we will have them when we go to the Sheriff, who by the way is her boss, to report her for harassment.

It is so sad that the crazy ex cares about one thing and one thing only, money. Her children spend very little time with her, even when they are there for the weekend, because she pawns them off on their friend’s parents or they ask to come home early. My husband and I keep all of this mess away from the kids. As far as they know, we all get along well. However, when asked if they miss their parents living together, they both said that they like their lives and would not want to live with the crazy ex.

So to all of you dealing with a crazy ex, know that nasty people will always get their comeuppance. You may not get to see it happen, or maybe you will get that satisfaction, but know that it will happen.