Are SM's there to be VIOLATED by their skids?
I am soooooo angry. This is why: My mom phoned me this morning (she lives far away from us, a good 8 hour drive by car) and I needed to find a document amongst my filing to help her with something. My stuff is kept in boxes in the garage and outbuildings. Since we moved 18 months ago, I have never unpacked it or ever even looked at it, as i have had no need to. I also had a box of old clothes which don't fit, but that I was hoping to get into sometime. Violation No: 1 happened last year when SD18 was living with us and she scratched in my boxes and found clothes and just started wearing them! No 'may I have them?'...nothing like that. I was peeved at the time, but there were so many battles with her at the time with stealing bigger things like sim cards, that I chose not to fight that battle and let it slide. Violation No: 2 was when my nail dryer was found in the outbuilding torn to pieces and the little motor was missing..NO ONE owned up to it, but I knew it was SS13 as he is always stripping things and I always have to make sure my stuff is not within reach of him or it will be stripped! SO I was furious, more at the principle of someone going into my boxes and just taking and destroying! Violation No: 3 happened today, as I said I was looking for a document and when I went into the outbuildings all my stuff was lying around on the floor, papers, documents, policies and the worst, my late father's stamp collection...all just thrown around! Needless to say, I didn't find the document I was looking for and after half an hour I was just so angry, disappointed and very very violated (don't know if "emotionally raped" is appropriate, but that's how I felt) WTF!!!! Don't I count as a person whose privacy is important in this family. I told FH and he says he doesn't know who could have done this!! WTF!!! SS13 is AWAYS in the garage and ALWAYS going into the outbuilding to "look for something" FH also has boxes of his own stuff, but he seems to accept his son fiddling with his stuff. And SS13 keeps his bikes, tools etc in the garage also. These kids are just too much for me, have they never been taught to repect peoples privacy & their stuff...
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When we were kids with my
When we were kids with my brother we used to do such things in my grandmother`s garage so I think or put a big sign on it that stay away or put your things somewhere else if they are so important. Kids are curious what are in boxes and like to play with such things. My brother was around 17 he was still taking apart things. First when he was a kid just small stuff after how he got older cd player, bicycle, motorcycle... Boys are fascinated by such things. If you know he is like that try and prevent these things
When my SD15 lived with us I
When my SD15 lived with us I had to literally lock my bedroom door, bc she would sneak things out of my room and hide them in hers. She was even stealing my undergarments and obviously wearing them!! I don't have kids of my own so I don't know if it is a kid thing or what, but it's awful having to watch your stuff like a hawk. And of course a lot of stuff if she had just asked I would have let her use or have, the behind-the-back sneaking around is what bothers me.
I feel violated all of the
I feel violated all of the time. I didn't steal or destroy my parents' things. I do think its easier for the kids to do these things to stepparents.
I have zero privacy and
I have zero privacy and nothing is sacred...my makeup, my perfume, even my monthly helpers are gotten into. My purse is gone through, my dresser, my shoes taken to play with. LOL...one time BF and I got some body chocolate...put it in nightstand drawer. Must not have tasted very good because we found the half eaten wrapper in the trash along with some strawberry emotion lotion...LOL and TMI I know but Really???????!!!!!!!!
I was brought up differently.
I was brought up differently. I respected my folks things. These kids are just lying, stealing, violating bad-ass kids who don't know any different. Believe me, if i could lock all my stuff away, I would. It's just the FH's attitude...like I'm being unreasonable and menopausal about stuff that is MINE. Can I help that he has such nosey, ill-mannered delinquent kids? It's my home too! How would they like it if I went into their stuff and messed it up or stole it? I'm sorry...I will not accept this. And I know it's not my kid because she has been brought up to ask before she touches. Well at least the SS13 is going away for 6 weeks tomorrow to his BM and sadly my BD11 is flying to her dad on Monday. I welcome the break, trust me, but will miss my kid badly...but she has to see her dad, as he lives too far away for her to visit alternate weekends, so she only sees him in the holidays.
I understand how you feel,
I understand how you feel, when I finally really got onto my DH about doing something about it, he goes and tells SD to quit doing it because he's tired of argueing with SM about it, not Hey it's wrong to take others things without asking and it's considered stealing but because SM is griping about you, nice. So that's when I resorted to locking my stuff up because it was obvious nothing else would be done about it.
Your husband must be my
Your husband must be my husbands twin. Then husband gets mad because they said they handled it regardless they threw us under the bus and made the kids hate us more.
My SD had no respect for my
My SD had no respect for my privacy and my DH didn't believe that she took my things "on purpose." Like BoutToBreak, she also took my lingerie. I ended up locking my things up.
My SD (26) recently stole a
My SD (26) recently stole a small lingerie bag from me when I went to visit a relative. Petty isn't it? Even though I know she did it, I can't prove it. I mentioned it to DH, and he thinks I could have misplaced it. I seldom misplace things, and it's yet to reappear as of today. Since then she went through some of my magazines when we were out and was too dumb to put them back in the order I had them . . . thinking I wouldn't notice.
Best advice I can give is . . lock your personal/private stuff up!
It's crazy, isn't it
It's crazy, isn't it Shannon?
I found my lingerie in my SD's gym bag and my DH STILL didn't think that she took it on purpose. Denial - it must be his middle name. I agree with you - lock it up!
BF and I used to talk locking
BF and I used to talk locking doorknob on bedroom door and unbelievably enough for my own bd16, But the battles with him over his 2 just crashing through a closed door without knocking and even so not accepting being told no or to wait
were seemingly all my fault. They had their own rooms and yet I would come home to find their pajamas in our room because they couldn't get ready in their own rooms? I am trying to get past the seemingly "small stuff" with the skids, but I still don't want to live with them. I just can't take working so hard to help raise someone else's kids when it is convenient for them, but get punished if I'm not "fair". Well, if fair is keeping all of your kids' teeth intact inside their head or even minimal visits to ER for stitches because they use their siblings as playtoys then I am a bad parent 
I love my bf but not his kids nor his judgemental family 
What makes me feel the worst is he knows this and still loves me?!??
Know what's funny? The Skids
Know what's funny? The Skids get into everyone's stuff EXCEPT mine because I told them that if they did get into my stuff, I'd go into their rooms and go through THEIR stuff and take it without asking. I didn't have to follow through, apparently there was a blue moon that day and the mere threat actually got through to them. I realize I'm lucky, though, and I also have SS's so they're not into my stuff anyway.