Confused!!!

Me and my husband have been together for 3 years. We recently had a son together 5 months ago. My 6yr old SD seems fine with the baby. But she is rude to me, disrespects me, and when I ask her dad to talk to her about it he does nothing. She doesnt more when he cant hear her but when he hears me getting on to her he says you guys need to quit arguing!!! Like im a 6yr old too!!! It really makes me mad! I we get her on the weekends which should be a time of fun, no I hate weekends. By him not talking to her about it and getting on to me is only going to make it worse. Then he wants me to pick her up from school on Fridays and drop her off with her mom! This is supossed to be his time to spend with her and yet Im always doing it. Im at my breaking point and I dont know what to do. I dont want to be around her and I dont want my son picking up her bad habits. It makes me sick she is always like dada can you help me, dada, shes not 2!! So aggravated, feels good to vent.

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Any advice?

have you tried saying

have you tried saying NO...as in "no, i willnot pick her up and drop her off"

I agree with folkmon, in

I agree with folkmon, in addition, talk to DH about the way he talks to you. He should say "SD, stop arguing with going loco" not "you two stop arguing" because you are not the same, you are the adult.

Also talk to SD privately, and let her know that she sounds like a baby when she says "dada" and if other kids her age heard her, would make fun of her.

Sincerely,

"I will die on my feet before I live on my knees"

I think that the getting on

I think that the getting on the spouse and the Skids when the Sparent and the Skid are sparing is a common BioParent trait. I think it bothers them when two people they care for have issues with getting along and lose track of which person they are married to.

My wife used to do this. I spoke with her several times about it indicating that I did not appreciate her undermining me in front of the kid when discipline was occuring. What finally fixed it is when she gave me the "you two knock it off" thing in public and I turned to her and in a very stern voice said "you will not disrespect me in public or in front of the kid ....... ever. Do you understand me?" She turned purple and turned and walked away. Later she told me I had embarrassed and offended her and that I owed her a applogy. I told her that now she knew how I felt and that since she had never applogized to me when she had embarrassed me over the same issue countless times that I figured we were even.

I got the silent treatment for several days. The next time the kid got lippy with me she got in his face and said something along the lines of "you will not argue with your father. Do what you were told NOW!"

Not the best way for me to have handled it but I asked nicely several times and was at the end of my rope. Had she not climbed my tailbone in public I likely would not have reacted the way I did but I was embarrassed and snapped at her instead of thinking before I spoke.

But ...... it got my point accross and it worked.

Success is rarely final. Failure is rarely fatal. It is character, courage and consistency of effort that count. Vince Lombardi (with some minor Rags modifications) To each according to their performance, screw Karl Marx. (Rags)

Thank you everyone I will

Thank you everyone I will try this advice this weekend. We'll see what happens.

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