Adult SDs...almost like he has "mistresses"
For all of you who deal with the adult SD issue (or maybe even a younger SD), do you ever feel like you are part of a "secret harem"? Like there is another world out there that is all your H's but you are not part of it?
Maybe I'm just Tiger Woods satiated, but I hate holidays regarding my adult SDs. Emails and Texts to "daddy" (of course I'm never included...) as to what they want, what they want to get him. And, I almost feel the need to "check" with him as to what I should get him in that his "girls" may have already been privy to that information and my gift will just be second best.
I've disengaged from so much of this, but it still bothers me to see his phone lighting up with texts, his Email filled with messages from his adult Ds about how they will "call him" when they are shopping to make sure they bought him the right thing, etc. It's almost incestual.
You buy a gift because it's a gift. Case closed. My parents usually write me a check to get what I want. But, my adult Ds
expect daddy to go running around finding them GIFTS. Ridiculous already. I wanted a pair of binoculars; took him 10 minutes to get them.
Just venting. Anyone else who feels like their H has "mistresses" regarding SD behavior, feel free to vent along.
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Comments
And, that's why I started
And, that's why I started this blog...
It's so reassuring to be reminded from time to time that we are NOT ALONE.
You make a very good point, tho. Before I came into the picture, they had very little to do with "daddy". So, yeah, I agree that a lot of the behavior is aimed at sending us a message.
I honestly could care less what they do, but I think it's pathetic that 30-somethings act like 2 years old "Daddy, I want I want..." and it's treated as "normal" I guess they just need some of daddy's "attention" still, even if it is just once a year.
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt
Excellent point, H!! Not
Excellent point, H!!
Not letting these "girls" know that their attitudes/behaviors are innappropriate is NOT teaching them how to exist successfully in the "real world".
I can so relate to your family being educated and not being fooled. My family, all educated, has never even MET my H's adult SDs. He has never invited them here the few times my family WAS here because, well, he was too ashamed. He knows they would be LOUD, rude, and who knows what other surprises. My family is very humble, but just good people. It's a shame, tho, we've been together for over 6 years now and his daughters have never met my family.
I never really considered that until you mentioned it, so thanks so much for the blog!! This site really puts things into perspective!! And I agree with you completely, shame on them.
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt
My daughter's graduation
My daughter's graduation party should be interesting...
She graduates from high school in June, was recently accepted to a wonderful college and will probably receive some sort of track scholarship.
I know my whole family will trek here to celebrate...I'm wondering if my H will want his D's here. Again, this celebration will be about their STEPSISTER not THEM. They have not met my family, and they know MY FAMILY knows how immature they act. It will be interesting to see if they are invited. I am not inviting them, I told my H he can invite whomever he chooses from his family.
I can just see it now; they show up, and start screaming "But, daddy, what about US??!!" I don't know if my H will take that chance. I do have a large extended family. Oh, what will they THINK...?? (my H is VERY concerned about what people think!!)
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt
Mini wife syndrome
I've got exactly the same
same age SDs absolutely horrible creatures they are
sadly after 12 months of bliss cause they had a strop and stopped talking to daddy they suddenly back on scene - they obviously missed the money he throws at them
i find they way they are very in natural / awkward and most definitely not normal parent / child behaviour
mum just contemplating if after 25 yrs of this shit if it's actually worth it
im struggling to disengage from the secret other wife part
it's bloody ruined my Xmas