Personally, I would hold off on meeting her until the two of you have decided whether this is a "serious" relationship. (A month and a half isn't that long.) My DH started out slowly, first just telling his daughters that he was "dating". A few months later, he told them that he was seeing someone exclusively. And then a little while after that, he introduced me to them - at a neutral place for a small period of time (we had lunch together -- so it was only a couple of hours).

Is the Biomom in the picture? That can complicate things -- as you will definitely see from reading posts on this site! She is another issue... If you get to the point where you decide this is a serious relationship, I definitely recommend that you buy and read the book Stepmonster.

Good luck with this!

BB

- You are not second best, you are not second class. Do not ever let anyone make you feel that way. (2Bloved)

I dated my H for 8 months before meeting SD. Don't jump into it to soon.

However... it was due to the circumstances, my DH and I played like we were good friends before letting the kids know we were an item.

As long as we were only 'dating', I did not want to introduce my BS to anyone... nor did I want to meet there kids. It was only when we pretty much decided this was a 'long term relationship' (about 6 months in maybe) that I chose to introduce them. I did not discuss any 'dating' with my son as we rarely saw each other when I did have my son... he didn't need to know.

I would say between 3-6 months if you feel the relationship is going somewhere, since she is older she will most likely know you are a girlfriend. If she was much younger I would say you would be fine meeting right away, but shouldn't show affection until the kid is comfortable with you. But since she is 9 its a rougher transition usually, so I would wait until you guys definitely know the relationship is serious.

"I child proofed my whole house, but they STILL get in!"