What is BM up to now???
My husband just got an email from BM, saying that she wanted to talk to him after SD8 had gone to bed. She suggested Thursday at 8:30, which technically, SD8 would not be sleeping by then, but whatever. My husband emailed her back & said no phone calls, if she had something to say, she could write a letter (or email). Yay! Because this is what I was thinking, too. A phone call from BM that late would mean neither of us would be sleeping until after midnight, because we'd be discussing whatever she called about. We've had enough of those nights!!!
Since she probably just got served the court paperwork, I'm thinking BM is up to one of two things...
One, she wants to talk on the phone to be "off the record", so she can threaten my husband, intimidate him, remind him that she already has a lawyer, that she's going to take SD8 away from him, etc. Since she's done this before, numerous times, it wouldn't surprise me at all. The last phone conversation they had was not pleasant, so I don't know why this one would be any different.
Or Two, she doesn't want to go to court & is going to try to settle it on her own. It's become obvious that BM doesn't want to go to court, probably because deep down she knows she might not win. But too bad. We're going to court because there is no other way of dealing with BM. We need a judge to decide & dictate everything. No one wants it to go this way, but BM leaves us no choice. We've been through this a million times with her. This is the end of it. Her nonsense has to stop.
And if BM really wants to "talk" to my husband, she can do it through her lawyer if she doesn't want to send a letter. My husband has given this woman a million chances & she's pissed away every one. Too bad, lady! I told my husband that he should agree to talk to BM...if she agreed to us recording the phone call. lol. That would never happen!!! Opinions?!
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Good for your DH!
We had to do all this crap with BM too. She always wanted to bicker and argue over every single thing, so we had to make a judge put every single little thing on paper. It was ridiculous, but sometimes it is soooo necessary!
I agree
It's probably one of the two things you mentioned.
Good job putting your foot down, and I think even if she wants to settle it out of court, going is still a good idea. That way you she can't try and manipulate anything later. Best get it done now!
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on." ~Robert Frost
Hmmm, could be either but
Hmmm, could be either but I'd keep my guard up. I'd maintain "radio silence" for now. Good for DH for standing his ground!
Recording convo
Aren't there laws about that? I wonder what the technicalities are about it. I thought you had to had let them know they were being recorded...or maybe only one party had to be aware of it...
Not sure but I thought there was something...
"God grant me the serenity accept the things I cannot change; the strength to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference."
Yes, but...
check with your local PD. In AZ you are allowed to record a PHONE conversation with only the knowledge of one party (you). We recorded ALL the phone conversations with psycho: I think she is related to your BM, because she does the same crap as yours; trying to take control, talk DH out of court, etc.
Good for you guys not accepting a phone call, it's just BM's way of keeping control. There is nothing TO talk about except the reasons you mentioned. It's also difficult to rationally discuss important issues when the other party is missing her brain!
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz
Good for your DH
BM tried that with us, telling DH that our lawyers are friends and want them to settle the issue out of court..
Let's see... Ummm NOPE! Court it is...
She really hated when DH kept answering her texts with
"I'm not at liberty to discuss anything further with you, I will see you in court"
So glad you
both are on the same page and are sticking to your plans. Don't let her think she has any wiggle-room.
Yep, she's up something
Whatver she wants, it's not something that will benefit you. Good for DH.
"Evil Stepmothers aren't born, it comes with the territory"
We prefer everthing to be
We prefer everthing to be via email. It doesn't allow yelling over another person and there is a record of what was said.
The Crypt Keeper "forget" or doesn't think that she should have to go through me (DH and I have a joint email acct). DH doesn't feel like hearing all of her emotional bullish and rambling on about unecessary topics (we don't care if your're bringing snacks to the damn soccer game and we don't care and don't want to know about your obese mom). She thinks that she shouldn't have to go through me to ask/make a schedule change. DH wants NADA to do with scheduling...period.
When he was taking her back to court he sent her a very polite/matter of fact email stating there is to be no more conversation about it, and wait until they go to court.
There are times when I need him to call her, but I think he texts b/c he doesn't want to have to sit and listen to her crap (though he listens by choice).
Keep everything in an email/certified mail.... That way she can't deny anything.
"I aint no Carol Brady"
Love the email idea!
I discussed this avenue with DH, he and I are going to implement just using emails to converse with trans-testicle immediately. WHY we did not start this earlier irks me since TT loves to yell at DH every chance she gets.
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz
Thank you all
for your comments. Good to know we're all on the same page!!! It makes me feel a lot better about things. I'm going to do an update blog today because there's more...