Long time no post. LONG
Good news…SS is now 25ish and lives across the country. Still annoying as crap but it is all pretty good. BM drama down to once every few years now. After the last brouhaha, I don’t think her and DH will ever even talk again. YAY!! BM is fading from my life.
Bad new…My idiot DS knocked up some booty buddy and they were stupid and did not use condoms. She did tell him she could not get pregnant. (and she told me also she was surprised she got prego because she thought she could not.) BUUUT!!! I have told my idiot DS for years…”No matter what is said…ALWAYS wear a condom.” Guess who did not listen?
Good new…Grand daughter is the BOMB! I love being a grandparent and would take a bullet for that little bundle of joy. .
Bad news…Once the baby was born, DS wanted to be with his child so he and the BM moved in together to try and make it work. STUPID AGAIN. She is a nut job and DS thought maybe he would change. Nope.
Worse news…Once he broke up and moved out, (he came to live with me and she went back to her dads) she became worse than most of the BMs on this site. UGH. She immediately cut us ALL off from the GB. She told DS that if he was not going to be a family with her, then he did not get to see his child and neither would his family. He ended up taking her to court to get some emergency parenting time. After 2 months of no contact he now gets her every Saturday, Monday and Tuesday from 8AM to 1:00PM.
And they had to force that on the BM. She said she is the mother so the child does not need to be away from her. She said that maybe when the baby is 13, she can see my son more. And MANY other crazy things like that. WTH?
She has been awful. I mean really bad. After the FIRST visitation day, she basically said she thinks the child was molested. My son flipped his shit on her and she back peddled and said that is not what she meant. After the THIRD visitation day, she said baby was really sick she must have eaten something bad at our house, or she is allergic to some plant like substances at my house. (the child has been to my house dozens of times during her life) BM is just picking at crap. She even took her to the DR. Per BM, the DR said that the baby was teething but the stress of being away from BM was making it worse. This is what the DR supposedly said. Lol. And the baby is not under stress…amazingly she remembers us all and has been having a great time. (she is under 1 year old) I thought she would be skittish but she was just fine.
So mediation is in a few weeks, to try and come up with permanent CO without going to court. It should be interesting to say the least.
Bad thing is that in Texas he will probably only get standard EOWE. They are very pro BM here. Anyway… Again…LOVE being a Gma! The rest sucks though.
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Comments
Oh, great. A GUBM.
Oh, great. A GUBM.
Willow, you can lead the horse to water and all... Too bad your DS didn't follow your sage advice. But I'm willing to bet he's a good dad, Grandma!!
Sorry, your son and the rest
Sorry, your son and the rest of the family are going through this. It's awful when you see someones "true colors". You think you know someone and before you know it, all h@ll breaks loose. My wish for you is that this situation improves and that BM comes to her senses and realizes all the harm that she is causing this beautiful child.
Thanks gals. I have always
Thanks gals. I have always heard that grand kids are better than your own kids. And it is true. Lol
BM is going to give us quite a ride I am afraid. Like I told my son…welcome to the next 17 years of his life. I am trying to not be too hard on him though cause he is being a good dad and I love his kid a lot. lol
Congratulations & Nanny-Cams
Congratulations with a happy/sad mixed nuance there. I know that is not the life you would have wished for your son. Happy G-baby times.
Nanny-cam your house during visits. Nanny-cam BS's visitation spots. Dash-cam the cars. I am not a big conspiracy person, but BM's who have demonstrated their intent, need to be taken seriously.
I used to work in TX decades ago with 'divorce workshops' for partners with minor kids who were separating --- nail down the specifics. Suggest the most clear boundaries. Common sense things. Suggest a communication wizard format. Comb the archieves here to forestall issues. Plan well. Your grandbaby's BM sounds like decades worth of misery.
Help your boy set up a good framework for the next ... uhm, ... 60 years of his life!
ETA: Oh, hey, "Hi," missed seeing you. Forgot to say that earlier.
Congratulations & Salutations!
Sounds like life has been very busy, with new GB and totally new situations and roller coaster rides. It IS indeed sad that BM is a nutcase, perhaps she will calm down once she grows up. Children having children - well thats another schema, but she wil eventually HAVE to grow up, as will your son.
I hope that you do follow advice given here, because as the BM gets a little wiser in the ways of child courts, and if she has anyone giving her advice, she could focus her poison even more sucessfully. Shes a button-pusher, and who knows what her goals are, what her games are, but they are there, to be certain. Once you arm yourself and your son, with knowledge, and nanny-cams and documentation, you will be able to forstall any molestation accusations. I remember is wasnt that long ago when Feral Eldest was accusing me of truing to get her kicked out (to BM) and making her younger sister cry because I was going to get her kicked out of our house as well and she would never get to see her father again. Feral Eldest is a carbon copy of BM, pathological drama-inducing liar. Ive spent many a time trying to figure out just WHAT the heck are the games, so I can neutralize my emotions, but its getting less and less worthwhile as time goes by. Less than 2 years until alimony stops and less than 6 years until Munchkin turns 18.
However, just a few weeks ago, BM tried to tell me that Munchkin SD12 has been telling her what a hardcore, mean, nasty b!tch I always am to her. When all this time I have been taking great care of her, buying her a paint set, making her lunches and sharing adventures. More button-pushing. Im sure that the charges and accusations are a big surprise to YOU, but these toxic people will find any and all buttons to push to find out which ones actually work, so they can keep pushing them. Stay strong and DOCUMENT!
Again - congratulations!!!