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Advice needed

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 5:29pm

My SS keeps putting my 3 year old up to saying bad words.. Today he was telling him to says sh!+ bc he was in trouble. I caught him in the act of saying brother say shit.. So I fussed at him & of course it turned into a melt down.

Any way my 3 year is following along and using the bad words ..he's does get punished - both do. Obviously I can't do much punishing of the SS ..I've sent mine to his room, busted his butt, no you can't say that, say this instead if that ..
DH does the same with SS and our son but it's not helping. As keeps encouraging and little one keeps aaying.

What do I do?

Comments

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

Submitted by BarkAtTheMoon on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 5:50pm

I've never raised small kids so what do I know, but I was a small kid once. Biggrin You can either take his favorite toy, put him in a time out or put a new crack in his ass. The third option worked for me as a small child. Bad behavior was not repeated that often.

Don't send him to his room -- all of his toys are in there. Make him sit in the corner or on the stairs with a view of the front door.

Have DH wash his mouth out with soap? Ah the good ole days.......

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 5:56pm

Whippings don't help or hasn't yet, Corber hasn't worked and time out is in the bed with your face laying in the pillow facing the wall . I'm afraid if we washed step sons mouth out with soap social services would be knocking on our door bc BM lol

oneoffour's picture

Submitted by oneoffour on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 5:57pm

How old is SS? Sit him down with a sheet of paper every single time he tells your son to say swear words and tell him as he is so keen on saying these words he better learn how to spell them. So 100 x - shit. 100x - bastard. 100x -poo poo head.

And your son sits by while he writes it out. And no TV for the evening for both of them.

Flying.Purple.Step.Monster's picture

Submitted by Flying.Purple.S... on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 5:59pm

Had similar problems with SS12 and SD11 teaching BS3 to stick his finger in his nose and then in his mouth. Now he does it all the time and I can't seem to get him to stop!

twoviewpoints's picture

Submitted by twoviewpoints on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 6:39pm

You tell the SS that every time your 3yr old say a bad word you will hand out a consequence to SS. For now do not punish 3yr old for saying the bad word (SS is delighting in seeing 3yr getting in trouble, it makes the bad word game all the more fun).

Of course yes, you do talk to your 3yr old when SS I out of earshot about how 3yr old is NOT to ay those words. No one wants a toddler with a potty mouth so you do need to be sure it's known repeating what SS eggs him into is wrong and won't be tolerated. It' your 'job' to teach the 3yr old , but without letting SS hear/see in the case that's going on currently.

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 8:12pm

We tried that in te beginning. But the 3 year old got to wear he was saying stuff without being prompted so he got his take busted and then speach of you don't say that.. Now he says stuff and will will follow it with don't say that? And we say that's right we don't say that we don't talk like that... But when SS comes home and says brother say shit .. He says "say shit?" And I say don't listen to your brother all he's going to do is get your butt busted.. So if he does repeat it he gets his butt popped or time out.

Shaman29's picture

Submitted by Shaman29 on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 7:02pm

Tell your H that until your SS stops this behavior, he's not allowed to be around your BS.

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Tue, 10/28/2014 - 9:56pm

We tried separating them. Granted it wasn't SS isn't allowed to come here but they weren't allowed to be alone together. The way his custody is and the way BM is we can't do the whole the kid can't come here

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Wed, 10/29/2014 - 7:18am

The problem is my SS has some bigger issues.. So there's more than just oh he's telling my kid to cuss ..but I'm trying to get the foul language under control. SS doesn't use cuss words except when he is telling bs to say it. I know it'd "fun" but lord have mercy

LuckyGirl's picture

Submitted by LuckyGirl on Wed, 10/29/2014 - 9:43am

Have you tried ignoring the pair of them? One of my favourite saying is "there's no show if there's no audience" and part of the fun for both kids is getting a rise out of you.
I dislike swearing and will correct my SDs if they do it in my presence. BD is 17 months and too young, but I doubt her sisters will try to teach her bad words... They'd have me to face Wink
I always tell them that any primary school child knows how to shout, scream, hit and swear... It's what we learn to do later that distinguishes us as adults!

Wah-wah-11's picture

Submitted by Wah-wah-11 on Tue, 11/04/2014 - 9:58am

Yes. I've tried ignoring it. It's like the older one gets a ride out of tattling on the little one, or he laughs at it. I've done the don't laugh at him. I've tried ignoring it when it's just me and the little one and he says it. He's been in trouble enough that he says it and looks at me and says don't say that?