I was a member here a few months ago then deleted my account. So now I'm back and I'm wanting some opinions. FH has his daughter for the next few months cuz BM remarried and moved to Germany with her douche husband. (Now do you remember me??)

Anyways..SD3 has scheduled chat time with them. Schedule isn't different from when SD3 had to talk to FH. They did make some changes for FH with times when he needed. When FH flew to Germany to pick up SD, BM asked FH if they could do multiple callers because her husband was going to be gone. FH told them that skype charges for that and that oovoo does it for free. He also mentioned that he requested oovoo to BM when this whole thing stared and BM said no because her husband used Skype. Well, they're using oovoo now to accommodate BM husband in the talks. SD did fine the first two times. They actually got her to stay on for an hour. FH was sad about it because he could only get her to talk for about 30-40mins. I told him to not feel like they are better because they watched him struggle for 4 months trying to figure out ways to keep a toddler online. There were times when SD didn't really feel like talking cuz she was watching tv so FH let her go and said they would talk next time.

Anyways, now SD3 refuses to talk to BM. She cries and throws a tantrum tell her dad no or the babysitter when FH is at work. SD3 babysitter is actually FH dad. He's so patient and gentle With her. BM will call with her husband and they will sit there and listen to SD3 scream and say no over and over for an hour. I don't know how this started. FH does know either. I told FH to talk to her incase SD3 feels
Like she has to be that way because she feels the tension between FH, BM BMH. He's spoken to her more than once. The only day that FH isn't there for these chats are Wednesdays cuz he works. He's had to leave work to get home so SD3 can talk because she won't. BM wrote FH an email about how hurtful it is that they can't talk long and SD3 seems like she's running things here because they heard her tell her papa "no" for 20mins. They told FH to give her a treat or tell her she's going to go in time out if she doesn't talk. This pissed FH off. He does discipline her when she doesn't listen and has told SD3 that if she talks she can get a treat afterwards. SD3 still doesn't want to do it. SD3 never acted liked this when it was FH time to chat. He just saw that she would get bored or was distracted and let her go.

What's funny about BM accusing FH of not disciplining SD3, because they say they do, BM sister told FH herself that since BM moved, they haven't talk to her. When they finally did, SD3 threw water on BM and the couch, laughing and BM and BMH laughed it off and said "you're so cute" (I've actually heard them say this to her during their chats). BM sister said "aren't you going to spank her?! That's not ok" and BM said "no, we just want her to be happy".

SD3 came back home with no manners! She always said "hey", "give me" and "no". FH struggles with her random tantrums which frustrates him. SD3 will ask FH "are you happy?" FH is confused and will tell her yes. I basically told him that when she throws her fits that let her know it's not ok and even if she's tells him mean things, he stills loves her. I also let him know that because his family in very involved in SD3 life, everyone needs to be on his page as far as how they treat her. No more of this bullshit of papa letting her get what she wants like ice cream in the morning, candy whenever she asks and babying her.

So the issues here are SD3 not wanting to talk to her mom and BMH, who she continues To call "daddy". BM refers her husband as SD3 daddy as well. I am not longer in that funk, I am not her mom. She only has one.
And the last issue is BM and BMH changing times to talk because 3pm wasn't working an I knew it wouldn't because that's when SD3 takes her nap. Then they requested 1pm our time, that didn't work.then 11am our time but SD still wasn't trying to talk. CO says that chats are 7pm SD3 time where ever she is. BM doesn't want to do this because that would make it 3 or 4 am their time. Who's fault is that? She and her husband came up with this! Did they forget the time difference when SD3 came back stateside? BM said they would try 7pm SD3 time but asked to do it on a Saturday instead of Sunday because of work scheduling. umm..BM you don't work. You stay home. I know she wants to accommodate her husband but if he can't do it then he can't do it.