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BM is sleep depriving the skids!

stressgirl79's picture

BM has started doing this thing recently that is reallllllly bugging me.

She gets out of work at 9:30 pm. Then she comes to our house, picks up SS10 and SD8, brings them to her house to sleep, and then brings them back in the morning at 8 so they can catch the bus. But she doesn't do it every night, and never really gives us much notice. And the most annoying thing is, when you keep them up this late on a school night and then don't come get them after school the next day, now I have sleep deprived skids to deal with because you wanted to be the one to wake them up in the morning.

Ugh, come wake them up at my house if it's that important! These kids are EXHAUSTED. To the point of crying because their toaster waffle is a little soggy on one side exhausted. I consider BM to be a good friend of mine, and I totally understand wanting to see your kids as much as possible, but this is making my life hell because the kids are so unreasonable because they're tired. I don't know how to say anything to her about it without sounding like a total bitch. DH sees the issue, but also doesn't want it to seem like we don't want BM to see the kids, because we do...but this is insane.

Comments

stressgirl79's picture

I have nothing against her being there for her children, in fact most of the time I welcome it. But the problem is that the kids are EXHAUSTED and they only get to see her for a few minutes at night, and a few in the morning. She used to come over here in the mornings (we live 5 min. apart) and get them on the bus and it worked out wonderfully for everyone, but suddenly she wants them to sleep there and I guess I just don't get it. I would love to see my two bio's that live with their dad every single day and be there to put them in bed and everything, but I realize that keeping them up super late and getting them up super early is probably only going to make me feel better, not them. SD8 and SS10 have rooms here, at BM's house they share a room with 4 other kids. I just can't help thinking that this is crazy.

MamaBecky's picture

Since you are lucky enough to have a friendly relationship with her I would just tell her what you observe. That they are exhausted and seem to be really upset and tired in the mornings. If she is a good mom and a good friend she will want to do whats best for them. Tell her that she can come to your home and get them around but that it is most important that they have a good nights sleep. They are going to start having serious problems in school and teachers will be calling if they are that exhausted daily!