Somewhat O/T: Joint Checking Account
I'm am fairly positive many of you will throw a big "NO WAY" out there, but I'd love some reasonable advice on getting a joint checking account with my fiance.
Let me start by saying that the child support he pays is taken directly out of his work check before anything is deposited into his checking. Therefore, we do not write any checks to BM from his (or what will be "our") account.
Everything we share, we split: the mortgage, the cell phone, the water and electric bills. We'll soon also be sharing the expense of day care for our new child. The household stuff is all in DF's name, and I write out a check to him for half the amount on everything. It's sort of annoying and seems like it'd be easier to just write out one check from a common account. Also, DF is not very good at keeping up on his bills -- always sending things out RIGHT on the date due, etc. I'm more of the organizer in our house and I would actually feel releived to know what is coming and going and being on top of getting the bills paid and how much money we have left over every week to pay for things like groceries or gas.
As far as other bills go, we each have a credit card in our own name (one is a home-improvement store card and one is an auto-maintenance card) but is for shared things as well -- we share these payments as well.
The only things we have that are separate is that he has one credit card in his name from a jewelry store (he bought my engagement ring with it...I hate that he did this!) and I have student loans I'm continuing to pay on for the next 20 years (or so). It seems to make sense that we combine our incomes into one checking account.
I feel like a joint checking account will also make us more responsible with money as the other person will always be able to see what we're spending. We are generally good at not spending money on unnecessary things but we certainly could do a better job when it comes to eating out for lunch or buying snacks at gas stations or whatever. I think it would make us both more accountable to the other person...however I feel it could also lead to nagging and feeling like we don't have privacy?
I know a lot of people recommend that you still have separate savings accounts if you join a checking account. I would like this idea but how do we determine how much of each person's money should go into their own savings account?
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I believe that a married
I believe that a married couple are a team. To me that means one checking account in both our names and making our financial plans together... That being said, I've moved out of la-la land and tell you what we ended up doing.
We have a joint checking account that we contribute to equally for household expenses. Our car payments come out of that too, but we contribute what the actual expense is based on what we drive. Our personal expenses are taken out of personal sub-accounts for things like student loans, credit cards, etc. What we have left over in those accounts are our personal spending accounts. We both have access to both the main account and both sub-accounts so I can see everything online. We have separate savings accounts as well.
The reason we did it this way was because of the ridiculous amounts of money my DH has given to his 2 worthless, loser adult offspring. The year we got married (2009) from the middle of January to the middle of October, he handed over close to 9 grand to them. I refuse to give them any of my money anymore!
So while our financial arrangement isn't ideal, it's working for now. I swear that his spawn saw me as a new revenue stream when we got married and really hit him up hard. I've told him that too.
to me yes it means you are
to me yes it means you are team if you have a joint checking however I also believe that you are a team too my making the decision to have separate ones too. See if you 2 sit down and decide that it will be best to have separate ones than do it. Your financial choices are something that you have to live with till you die. If it is better for you do have one and him to have one than you should not saying that your money is not all your house hold money b/c it can be just that your money is in your account and his is in his account. See what I mean?
I can see what you're saying,
I can see what you're saying, spunki! Although I don't feel this way about my situation, a past relationship of mine had me feeling the exact same way. Not that it's wrong to feel that way, I just know that the dynamics in every relationship are very different and you obviously need to do what you feel is best. I'd say if you are scared about it you probably shouldn't do it...or else take baby steps towards it if you DO want to work towards that.
Sounds like in your situation, the joint account will work well if you both have a set amount you put into it each month or paycheck. Then maybe the rest will be in individual accounts. You could still link them all together so you can see what's going on, but you may still have a sense of independence that way?
I agree with stepgin that a
I agree with stepgin that a married couple is a team and finances generally should be joint.
My wife and I have joint accounts with the exception of an individual credit card for each of us. I have had mine since before we met and she has one we set up for her so she could build her own credit after we married.
Our checking account is joint, our savings account is joint, our investment accounts are joint and we are each the beneficiary on each other's IRA and 401K accounts. She has some school loans that she had prior to our marriage and we took out some more jointly for her MBA.
Our situation was a bit different than yours when we married 16+ years ago. We had nothing but my recent BS diploma, about $10K from the recent sale of the home I purchased with my XW and a pay check so we have built everything we have together.
We did have a separate on-line checking account in my wife's name only to receive the direct payroll withholding deposits for CS but since my SS turned 18 in Aug 2010 and CS is no longer active that account is non active.
I think the joint account thing is the way to go in your situation and in most marriages unless there is some extenuating situation that makes sense not to do joint. How is that for sitting on the fence on this issue? :?
IMHO of course.
Best regards
I also agree that finances
I also agree that finances should be a partnership. I basically posted this because I wanted to see if anyone had thought up anything I needed to be concerned about. Really though, it just reaffirmed what I've already been leaning towards: it just makes more sense for us to manage our money together, rather than separate.
We have a joint savings
We have a joint savings account that I use to pay the bills. I have checking and savings accounts at one bank, and he has both at another bank. We opened a joint savings account at his bank when we got married, and as I now pay all the bills, I created a budget and tell him how much he needs to transfer to the savings account each month. Then once a month I transfer the money out of savings to pay our bills. This works nicely for us because any money he has leftover he can do whatever he wants with. Also, we are both savers, so he puts extra into the savings for us and I just leave it there.
DH makes double what I make, but he simply hates paying bills, so this has worked out nicely for us. He had outstanding credit card debt, and now that I take care of all the bills, we are virtually debt free. When he and BM went back to court for CS modification, I convinced him to have the CS garnished (it wasn't before) because that's even less that he has to do. We might not be traditional with one checking account, but it works nicely for us.