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Would you?

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

Hi everyone, been a long time since I posted, but I keep up on the site just have not had much to post about. It has come to our attention that there is someone who BM used to spend time with, but no longer does and has called BM a bad person and a bad mom, who I found on social media. Knowing this and seeing that this person is no longer friends with BM on any social media, would you message the person to ask them to elaborate and see what you could find out? I am torn about doing it.

How to not worry?

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

I have not posted in quite some time as there has not really been too much to report. Only thing that was what I guess you could call interesting is Sunday morning we were to talk to the SDs on BM’s phone.

Stability for SKIDS

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

I have not posted in a while, but I do read blogs/forums pretty often and something that has been brought up by a few people on here and simply disregarded by others within the last week has really hit home with me. One thing that can often be forgotten about by either/both biological parents is about how important stability is for children, even more specifically young children. Separation, divorce, custody battle, emergency custody hearing, moving, new partner/partners, new schools, etc.

Milestone event etiquette as a SM

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

Over the past two days, I have seen posts referencing SKID weddings and the “duties” of biological parents. No one has called them duties, but that is just an easy way to reference what I am talking about. As I have only been with my boyfriend 2 years and the SDs are young, there have been no milestone events for them yet. My question though is when these events occur, are us as SM’s supposed to be okay with our SO walking his daughter down the aisle with BM if that is what SD requested? Or taking photos with the SD or SS, both BM and BF plus just their child or children?

Coinciding with the forum post on pet names for children

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

I read the forum post from today discussing a father's pet names for his teenage children and it made me think of someone from my hometown. So on facebook I am friends with this man who's 33 from my hometown and he posts almost a picture a day of his daughter, which is totally fine. It is the captions that he posts for the photos that to me are weird and probably will make him single forever, I will post those below.

What is with BM's?

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

I do not understand how the BM in my situation, just told my bf last week how he "is still a terrible person" and goes on and on playing victim of all the things my bf has "done" to her, but then still has on her facebook photos of him and her, photos of him and the children, an album of their wedding photos, says on her page how "my hubby and my girls are my motivation," but she doesn't have a hubby, she has an ex hubby, plus her page says "single" and changed her name to her maiden name for her profile...

To this day still bothers me, but not to the point of leaving SO

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

This is totally random, but it is sparked from BM's ridiculous text messages brought this back up in my mind today. SO found out that BM had lied about taking child to doctor than it got into this whole thing with BM saying it's time for them to move on and forward and she wants to be left alone... Bf has been with me for 1.5 years, was separated for a year, but is now divorced from her. When we met he had been separated 6 months, living on his own, etc. 

What is with all these HCBM saying how they want to "co-parent"

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

I keep seeing in blog entries and forum entries on here how BM says how she wants to "co-parent" or complaining about why our SO's will not co-parent with them. The BM in my situation even says the same stuff too. What these HCBM REALLY mean though is why can't you just tell me what I want to know, help me when I want help, and do whatever I want you to do so I am not unhappy. They don't really want to co-parent at all because their definition of this is clouded and biased.

Co-parenting does not mean and does not entitle BM's to: (especially when their ex is with someone else)

Call me controlling, but there would be no way in hell

stepgirlfriendfurmom's picture

I feel like lately I have been seeing a lot of posts by women having either boyfriends or husbands who are still very much enmeshed with BM aka their ex or are putting themselves in situations where they very much deserve better, but for the sake of loving their SO, are willing to toss these issues aside or try to convince themselves these are not concerning.

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