Part Two... This is What SM said to the principal and I"M EMBARASSED!
Principal and I chatted a bit. She said that she was not trying to cause any drama by contacting me last night but she was truly concerned that my daughter was getting yanked from the entire show as SM was so agressive.
So... SM comes in and stands by principal who is in the front row directing the scene. Principal sees her and asks if she can help her. Principal has never seen her before but when SM asks if DD needed to be there, she figured it was the SM. Principal says yes that it's a full cast dress rehearsal the night before opening night.
SM then lays in on the principal stating that the time commitment is ridiculous, the fact that they pull kids out of school to work on this is ridiculous and that the fact that school shut down today so they could practice was ridiculous.
Principal apologized and confirmed that it was a very large time commitement which is why families and students sign a commitment form. She then reminds her that the school is working towards becoming a performing arts school which is why there is a large emphasis on the production but she assured her that they plan the year around it and that the kids are still further along academically than the standard schools per the academic calendar.
PRincipal then lets her know that NO, she did not shut down the school for the play. She shut down the school because the district office shut down all schools in the district. (side note - we had a huge storm and all 7 counties shut down all schools. Been on the news, social media... but I digress)
Then SM has the nerve to say, "I find that hard to believe. I have two boys in another city (my boys, her ss's) that attended school today. (side note they go to a private school that probably didn't get the message and they said kids could stay or go yesterday).
Then SM asks again if she really needs to be there. Principal says the same thing. SM says, "fine" and stomps off and crosses her arms and has a scowl on her face.
Principal sees her there still grouchy and in a concern for DD, goes and tells SM she can go. SM says, "no... she needs to be here" with an attitude. Principal insists.
OMFH. SM has some freakin balls.
And obviously way less class than I gave her credit for.
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Comments
This is embarrassing. I would
This is embarrassing. I would demand no more school info/communication with the SM. Only you and ExDH. It was a privilege to be so open with info in the first place, but now she has abused it.
THIS!
I agree with everything you
I agree with everything you say. I told him there are plenty of times that kids work on "non academic" things in other schools.
His problem is that he never did anything. He actually went to a continuation school for HS because he was an outcast and screwed off in school. Now he thinks he knows everything.
My opinion is that he tries to over compensate... but what do I know I was only married to the fool for 10 years.
I DO agree with SM's
I DO agree with SM's concerns/complaints...
School was cancelled yesterday here in BS4 and SD16 district... yet SD16 had basketball practice at the school at 3 p.m.?? SD16 got out of school ALL day on Tuesday with an "Educational absence" excuse because she was doing a bottle and can drive. WTF? Why is that being done during school hours and why is a student who is FAILING 3 classes even ALLOWED to participate?? It really, really irks me when emphasis is put on extra curriculars and not academia by the SCHOOL.
BUT with that being said, I know my place. I am the SM. I would NEVER waltz into the school and state my piece. I'm guessing that SM and your ex are on the same page with this and maybe SM was just the "spokesperson" or she is a rouge on a rampage?
I'm also a bit annoyed at the
I'm also a bit annoyed at the principal? Why did she not take SM up with your Ex? Why is she dragging YOU into the middle of it? Sorry but that seems a bit unprofessional to me.
You're right and she said she
You're right and she said she wasn't trying to cause drama when I spoke with her. She stated that when she sent the email last night she was concerned that DD was going to be pulled from the play.
Well, now if the principal
Well, now if the principal hadn't told on SM then how would BM know about SM's atrocious behavior in regards to her daughter?
Right, wrong, indifferent...
Right, wrong, indifferent... SM overstepped, big time. It's not as though she's dealing with an uninvolved BM who doesn't take interest, and she has to be in charge all the time...she's throwing her "weight" around about kids that are not hers and that your ExH isn't even custodial parent of. You're being nice - I wouldn't be so nice.
I don't know whether or not
I don't know whether or not the principal was trying to stir up trouble. I think that she contacted the CP with the incident. There are enough BMs out there that would flip their ever-loving minds if they weren't told about every single little thing ever to do with their bios.
You need to let your ex know
You need to let your ex know that SM is not to do pick up anymore. It is his kid, she shouldn't be involved. She acted poorly and that reflects on all of you. She sounded petulant, like a child. Children get punished. Her punishment is no more involvement at the school.
I would be all over him about restraining his wife. She clearly overstepped.
Agree also. I even told ExH
Agree also. I even told ExH that of be happy to help with transportation of the times were too late for him (he had one day, last night to deal with a late rehearsal) but he declined because he'd rather play house and have SM run around for him.
Good question. I'm sitting
Good question. I'm sitting here thinking that if I tel the school she's not allowed, then I'm a crazy bm. If I tell ExH that sm isn't allowed to pick up kids then I'm out of line and crazy. How am I Supposed to dictate to him who picks the kids up from school on his days.
I think I need to lay low and regroup. I will see them tonight at the performance. I'm actually picking my boys up from school to get all their scout camping things together so that they can go with their dad and their troupe tomorrow morning for a camp out (don't get me started on how he tried to fight not to take them because it should be family time, even though one needs to go as a requirement to move up). So I will need to provide everything to ExH after the performance.
Dh says I should just kill them with kindness. ExH is very clear that I think she was out if line. Heck after reading the principals email he may even be upset with her as she's overstepped before.
As far as I'm concerned, dd will attend the school next year. I don't even think the ex realizes I have sole legal custody. So I'll let him do as he wishes but I hild the cards. I won't engage with him.
If he wants to go to court, so be it. We can open up the books of his multimillion $$ construction company and I'm pretty darned sure hi support will go way up. And what is he going to tel the court "I want legal so I can move my ds out of this private christian school. Yes. She's always gone to religious private school. Yes. She goes to church functions and church camp but I don't like this Christian stuff. No. I don't want her in a performing arts school even though she has a huge talent and lives to sing. I want her in the public school by my house".
Sure. Let's try that with the judge. He HS no idea because we never went to court.