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I'm about to kick DH's asss

step off already's picture

Weeks ago, after several blow outs regarding him not taking acre of the yard and his "man jobs", I took the tIme to write out a list entitled, "things that are important to me". It included things like/

- If you take something out, put it away
- if we entertain, clean up everything within 24 hours
- be respectful of family comin areas and keep then clean
- be proud of or home

... And several variations of this same concept.

Last weekend we entertained and I have been working all week to put the house back together while I am home with baby. This weekend was supposed to be a yard / house weeked. It stars off fine enoug as I told the kids that their rooms/ closets/ beds / drawers needed to be taken care of an we had yard work to to. Dd 13 started working on her room last night as she wanted to do something with friends today at noon. Her room was great and I ha her pick up crap in the yard (mostly towels and garbage that was dh's responsibility).

When dd got out int the hard, dh had the boys head out and start to trim vines and take leaves. This lasted about an hour before our green bin filled up. fine. It's not he boy's job. It's dh's.

Quick rewind. I told dh that I absolutely wante leaves cleaned up from under porch, stairs, tree and yard and I wanted bins trimmed and yard mowed.

What has dh spent the entire day doing?

No. Nothing to do with yard work other han his one hour of supervising the boys. He has washed, waxed and buffed his fricken truck. Then at 4:30, he comes In and wants to cook rice as we were going to attempt sushi tonight. p

I ask him, wtf? No vines have been clipped, no yard has been mowed. I'm glad he had fun playing with his bidding machine ad all but before any cooking get done

Comments

step off already's picture

Sorry. I'm also taking care of our 2.5 month old

Anyway.

I tell him there will be no cooking bit he can feel free to clean the final pan from last weeks cookout or he can finish the rest of the breakfast or lunch dishes.

Or even better yet! How about you actually do one of the yard chores I asked you to do. (don't mind the fact that you said "of course, no problem).

I told him that I'll sell the house if he's not going to do the yard work (as he promised he would when we looked at the house)

step off already's picture

Last thing.

And even though he knew I wanted a family fun day one day this weekend, he went ahead and scheduled himself for an estimate tomorrow and tried to use the excuse "well, what was I supposed to do. They kept rescheduling"

I don't know. How about say, " I'm sorry, Sunday is a family day".

I guess I will go have my own family day. And SS can decide to hang around and wait for dad or come with me and the kids.

JennSunnySideUp's picture

:jawdrop: WOW! That is such a shame that the KIDS are willing to go out and do yard work but DH isn't. You should take pride in your yard and your home. When people come to see you, that is the first thing they look at.

DO BETTER, DH!!!!!!

step off already's picture

Yes! Yes! Yes!

I'm so upset right now. I - yes"I" - bought this house for all of us over a year ago. It has a very large yard and he assured me that he'd easily take care of it and said I shouldn't waste money on a gardener. Worst mistake ever.

Everything is over grown and trashed. Half because of neglect and the other half because of his dog.

newbiestepmom25's picture

Can I watch the butt kicking? Prehaps you should walk in front of him in something sexy with heels while he is watching TV. Take off your top and when he starts drooling say " sorry you won't be enjoying me until you get off your arse and clean up the lawn". And walk away and fed the baby. That's how I use to get things done lol.

step off already's picture

Lol. I TRY this one but he'll say I'm being mean.

Lucky for him he's apologized and has now mowed the lawn (15 whole minutes) ANd is now working on the vines.

That's what I hate! It's not like any if these things take a long time or are difficult - especially when you stay on top of them.

Cocoa's picture

my dh is like this and I think it's because this was my house before we married. I bought on my own. I think he's jealous that he'd lived his life with his ex moving from house to house, not paying bills, never truly owning anything. and now he's stuck paying at least 7 more years of child support. AND he was a spoiled momma's boy and lazy. he's come a very long way, I admit, but when I ask him to mow the grass, he says i'm "punishing" him. ha! I am now trying to maintain the home on my own, but I do nag about trash and mowing. i'm not going to let this house go down hill. told him i'm considering hiring a handy man. I've spent all weekend painting the kitchen, he help a little here and there (glad to see a little shame in him). but, we have a lot of problems and I've moved out of the bedroom. living my own little life for the most part. this sure isn't the marriage I envisioned. I think maybe we marry too quickly, basically buying a pig in a poke. and, since women are such good nurturers, we spoil them and then wonder why they don't help us. i'm back pedaling right now, forcing myself to "allow" him to take care of himself. i no longer wait on him. he'd gotten to the point he was constantly asking me to do things he could do himself. but, at least he pays his share of the bills and takes care of his child support. but until that day comes that he cares for this house like he would his own, his name will never be on the title.