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bm is getting a taste of her own medicine

spunkiedolittle's picture

Submitted by spunkiedolittle on Mon, 02/20/2012 - 10:01am

sd14 moved in with dh and myself just before christmas. obviously they have no school today, but according to sd14 bm was complaining that dh wouldn't give her the "xtra" visitation time. for starters SHE NEVER asked and second of all, dh would've only denied upon sd14's request because sd doesnt' like going to her mom's (only does cause we make her-simply so she can continue a relationship with her)

but with all the time bm denied dh xtra time i'm almost not surprised that she didn't ever ask because personally, for as selfish as she has been, dh has a hard time being the bigger person now that he has the upper hand

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Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Mon, 02/20/2012 - 10:07am

Honestly, at 14 you should not be forcing her to see her mom at all. She is old enough to decide what she wants. We have full custody and SS at 14 is allowed to make his own decision on seeing his mom. He is uncomfortable there and is counting down the last 8 visits he has to do.

If you do not have a court order, let her decide.

spunkiedolittle's picture

Submitted by spunkiedolittle on Mon, 02/20/2012 - 10:16am

TECHNICALLY bm still has custody of her. we are in the process of getting that changed. i told dh that he COULD set it up so that sd only see's bm when she truly wants to, but that would probably mean sd15 would get the same, and he doesn't want to gain 1 daughter and lose the other.

imo, as long as visitation doesn't affect ec's etc, then i'm all for her going which may become an issue later (or if bm can't be there for visitation-she is but sleeps most of it due to work schedule=which i agree is grounds for letting sd come home)