[My apologies for this very long post] SS11 bday was Nov 26th. DH sent a gift card by ToysRus (so ss11 can purchase his desired video game). Gift card purchased at ToysRus to ensure BM does not us the funds for herself. At any rate, as of Dec 17th (yesterday) DH's numerous voice messages left for his son had gone unanswered. As a result, he called BM to see what's going on. BM is such a conniving liar & she's always trying to create a wedge btwn me (the wife) & my DH . . . she hates the fact that he married me & not her & for that reason I'm forever viewed as her arch-enemy (SMH). She tells DH that she doesn't know what the problem is that she had been hearing his call attempts to their BS11 however she was unclear as to why he wasn't answering the phone. In my silent thoughts, I'm like huh???? what??? That doesn't make sense (who's the parent vs the child? At any rate long story short, she goes into various excuses of complaints stated by BS that BS hates talking to DH b/c he doesn't like when DH asks him to talk to him in Spanish or that DH talks to him in Spanish b/c he doesn't understand (SMH) yet another excuse . . . another complaint BM mentioned among all her nonsense claims was that BS said that [I] got all up in his face over 3-years ago telling him that I wasn't welcomed in our home any longer (SMH) b/c that didn't happen (especially not in that way). So, when DH told me about this nonsense my response to him was that you should never believe anything that comes from BM's mouth b/c she's a liar & she's constant in trying to make you believe that if you were [not] with me then you could have a relationship with you BS. That's her mission in life (which is why she's incapaale of establishing & maintaining a functioning, lasting relationship of her own). Her mission is to create a wedge btwn DH & me (using her son as the pawn b/c she knows how much DH loves his son). She's gone as far as accusing me of being violent, bipolar, sexually deviant, evil, a time bomb waiting to explode, etc. NOw keep in mind that BM does not know me at all she has only seen me in a court environment when DH filed a cicil lawsuit against her. She is an extremely jealous & pathetically (physically unattractive woman) & her personailty only make her outer appearance decline worst. SS11 kept telling his BD my DH that he just didn't want to talk to him which is why he wouldn't call him or return his call. DH told him that it was rude for him to not call & acknowledge that he had received his gift card or to even text-message the fact. BS had no response . . . my thoughts that SS11 is stuck btwn a hard place & a rock. I strongly believe that SS11 loves his dad dearly, however, that BMs obsession to block or alter the possibility to establish fostering a loving relationship btwn son & dad, is continuing to get in the way of him being able to show his love to his dad. In the past, BM has disconnected SS11 cellphone so that DH cannot call; she has disconnected her cellphone as well as changed both numbers failing to provide the new numbers to DH for almost a year of no communication (other than her receiving & cashing her monthly child support checks). She's so consumed in hurting & punishing my DH for leaving her that she continues to lose sight on whom she's hurting more. She also told DH yesterday that she's going to start sending SS11 to therapy sessions b/c of your wife getting all up in his face telling him he's not welcomed in her home . . . I'm like huhh??? seriously???? This female is so ridiculous . . . ss11 visited in our home the summer of 2007 when he was 7-years going on 8-years & I was preggers with our son to be (now) 3-year-old. Is she kidding me?? Is she serious??? It took her over 3-years to determine therapy was needed for her son (SMDH). Another one of her ploys to make DH think that I'm his major problem that he's not having a relationship with his so . . . when it's just simply her jealousy & evil ways that's preventing it. I strongly believe that BS needs therapy, howeve, it has nothing to do with me b/c this child has always had a loving relationship with me despite her efforts to try to convince him that I am a bad evil person (SMH). I suggested to DH that he is the adult in this situation and that he should consider that his son is in the full custodial care of his psycho-BM & that he has no other options then to follow her instructions if he wants peace in his life. BM says that SS11 cries each time DH calls him or talks to him, etc. Therefore, I told my DH that if your son is crying each time you're attempting to call him, it's not for the reasons BM is trying to make you believe that it has more to do with her & how she's stressing him about you. SN: please keep in mind that this past March we visited our home town (where SS11 lives) and he was so happy to see us & to meet his baby brother (our soon to be 3-yr-old). He expressed his love for all of us & during his entire day he spent with us [& this is no lie] BM repeatedly & obsessively sent text messages to him asking him things like what are you doing, where are you, what are you doing now, are you still where you said you were, what are you eating, when is your dad bringing you back home . . .straight craziness & no life (erractic behavior). Her behavior was so bad that when DH attempted to pick his son up to visit with him prior to our return to our home (out of state), his son was tearful & said he didn't want to go. BM took SS11 in a back room & did what she does & forced SS11 to go with my DH. I told DH then that he should not have made him come that he should have left him there. Again, when he was with us for about 30 to 40 minutes BM started the text message bullcrap again. I took DH to the side & suggested that he takes his son by to his mom that this was not healthy for him. That was the last time we saw SS11 or spoke with him. At any rate this explains why I suggested to my DH yesterday that as the adult parent that truly loves his son that he should love his son enough to not want to put his son through any unnecessary stressors from his BM. I told him that you must know that your son does not call you or return your calls b/c he's been instructed not to by his BM. Also, the distinctive ring assigned to DHs phone number has been setup (I"m sure) by BM so that she'll know each time the phone rings & that it's my DH calling (SMH) I've never seen anyone go to such lengths to keep a child from having a relationship with their father. I suggested to DH to go to God in prayer about the situation & to simply leave his alone (so that he doesn't have to continue to experience the emotional strains & damages of his mother's actions). I told him that that more you pull for your son the more she was going to pull him in the opposite direction & that is truly damaging & hurtful for any child to endure. What are your thoughs on this very sad issues stepparents, BMs, BDs, etc. Any suggestions are welcomed. Also, this past Fall I looked into legal representation & DH opted not to spend the funds for an attorney (that in this economy he wanted to secure as much funds for emergency instead). Again, my apologies for such a long post but it's been awhile since my last posting. :?