Very Concerned-- Need advice
My fiance and I have always planned to move away from the town we live in now. Plan is that in 16 months we will move at least 3 hours away. I am moving to go back and finish grad school. Anyways I have always thought that SD2 would be much better off coming with us. Even BM acknowledges we can provide SD with a better more stable life, but I am beginning to wonder if SD is too connected to BM to leave. Has anyone else been in a position like this? We want to take her but don't want to scare her for life. And BM has already agreed to let us take her. BM is way too irresponsible to take care of SD for the majority of the time. Has anyone had major problems with BM living so far away? How does the long distance thing work? Do little girls normally want to stay with their moms even if they don't deserve the title?
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i think
it would depend on yours and Hs relationship with SD" when i was this age i was pretty much raised by my nana due to mum workign we all lived in the same house but i never really saw my mum and this was ok for me
i think if its the best thing to do for you SD then go for it if it doesnt work let her go back to BM
life is a box of choclates you never know what your going to get (i always pick the coffe of the box what about you )
If bm is
"too irresponsible to take care of SD most of the time" then I would certainly consider taking her with you if BM is in agreement. How much time do you spend with SD now?
~Evil
If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. ~Abigail Van Buren
Currently SD spends most
Currently SD spends most time with us and she spends little time with BM. I would say she spends 10 hours top with BM and the other time BM has here she is at a babysitters house.
Take SD in if you can
If the BM will give her up, I would definitely take the SD in if I were you. You still can reach a child so young and she will be better off in a stable household.
Be prepared for BM to change her mind though, especially if she is now receiving child support. A lot of BMs I know of would not give up their child if it means they will no longer receive payments from the dad. Why exactly? not sure but it definitely happens every day. Good luck to you!!
"In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer." -Albert Camus
was this situation long ago!
my mom was very irresponsible with me, my dad decided to take me and move in with him, i wanted to go with him but at the same time i had lived with my mom for most of my life, my mom made alot of bad choices and wanted to run from her problems i was in ohio she was going to colorado, so we were across the country and from personal exp. it sucks!! i knew my mom wasnt the best for me and i had an awesome step mom who had been taking care of me since i was three with my dad! My mom was very immature and was more like a friend then a mom! so its very very hard and their will be alot of tears and some rejection! i know i put my step mom through hell and if i would have known now what i didnt know then i definitely wouldnt of!! But its a tough situation!! Good luck!