ooooooh that one bothers me.....

SD13 wants to join some class that is 3 days a week at 4pm. DH cannot get her there as he works til 6 everyday. BM doesn't work currently, is laid off and I work from home full time. I also have 2 bios of my own (not DHs) that I do everything for without help from DH, my XH or BM (um yes why would she have to do anything for my kids, right) but the expectation is that I should be fully available to her and her kids - NOT

So the class, DH calls me saying he can't drive her and SD is all upset and she really wants to take this class so I said very nicely and not so sweetly... and why exactly can't BM drive her? Dh says, BM says she can't because she might find work. I said, ok. DH is waiting for me to say I will drive her. No way - I have 2 of my own kids to drive around and I told him flat out, why should I commit to SD for the next year, 3 days a week when BM has MORE availability and won't even make herself available. BM signed her up for this class and just assumed someone else (me) would drive her for BM, when BM is a royal witch to me at any given time, talks badly about me behind my back yet expects me to drop everything (including my own bio's events) to drive her kid she signed up to her event.

I hate these BMs.

Caller ID is a tell all end all. People are so dumb when they say they did or din't call cause you always know if their lieing.BM wants her cake and eat it too. YOu just served it to her on a silver plates. LOL }:)

I just got off the phone on a 30 minute rant with my BFF about this same subject. BM in my situation is a piece of shit from the bowels of the Earth. I haven't written on ST in a while but in my first blog I described how she is a skank who had 3 kids by 3 different men. The oldest SS20 is my DH's. SD18 and SS17 he thought were his but they are not he found out after DNA testing.

To make a long story short, she and DH never married. When SS20 was a toddler she married a man and cheated on him with DH and other men. SD turned out to be the husband's and SS17 belongs to another random man SS just met two years ago. As any POS BM would do, the trifling tramp named both in the husband's name since they were still legally married and he has been made to pay CS for years to both. She hits up the bio dad and his wife randomly for things such as a phone for SS etc. my DH always paid CS and took care of SS20. So, basically, BM's job is a professional breeder.

My DH is the only one of the 3 who gives a rat's ass about these kids. He had already bonded with the last two when the testing was done. He took them in a couple of years ago after his bio son graduated and went back to BM's state. SD was getting into trouble and BM was not responsible and still isn't. Since they have been here she has only come once to see her kids. Her mom bought their tickets home Christmas 2011 and DH bought their tickets to go to HER dad's funeral about 7 months ago. She gets state assistance! Has a live in GF who works, gets CS for skids who live with us and hits her mom up (who is pretty well off) for money. Yet, she NEVER pays anything for these kids except for a few times when DH puts his foot down. She somehow finds it then. Which tells me she does it because she knows she can.

I don't understand what makes these tricks feel so entitled. I don't do anything for them or put any of my finances into them. Maybe if she had a grateful attitude instead of acting like these are my DH's bios and he HAS to take care of them. They keep getting into trouble in school. SD may or may not graduate. sS has had two 10 day and one 5 day suspension this semester alone for fighting! BM sits up there (we're down south and she is up north) on her fat lazy ass and does not work or contribute and it burns me up when she calls my DH or texts about them like she is so concerned. First of all they are old enough to where she can just talk to them. This is too much drama to me for someone else's kids. My parents raised a two of my cousins at different times. They did not give my parents half these problems and they were blood kin!!!

3fam, like you, I have my own bios, BS12 with my XH (who ironically lives in the same state as BM) and BS8months with DH. XH is not involved with BS12. He makes promises that he never keeps and decided March would be a good month to abruptly stop CS and BS takes expensive meds for severe anxiety attacks and depression. His CS helps me out a lot and this is not the time with another young baby for him to leave me hanging. I never ask my husband for help with my BS. I usually have BS8 months more because DH works out of town a lot. I work full time as a school administrator. I have to take him to daycare in the mornings, drive 45 minutes to work, then home after pick him up only to get home and make bottles and prepare for the next day.

I took today off after spending the weekend with my mom who lives an hour away for Mother's Day. I let DH keep BS8 months so I can have a break. It really pisses me off that DH works so much, never takes vacation and we have not been ANYWHERE since we married in Fall 2011. I am starting to become resentful of DH, BM and SKids because while I am working hard and taking care of my sons she gets to hop her fat ass around like she has no care or responsibility thanks a lot to my DH! The kids situation was really bad but by getting them he has by default enabled BM to continue to be the 42 year old loser that she is. My DH acts like he doesn't understand why I feel the way I do. I can't even get that much time with him because he works so much to cover her slack and take care of her kids. I have been thinking a lot about my exit strategy this past weekend because I am sick of feeling like I am getting the short end of the stick. Another divorce and broken family was the last thing I want but moving closer to my mom and friends I know I'll get more support with my boys than here with DH. He is committed to work and this bitch's kids I may as well be a single mom.

My friends listen but they can't offer much insight as they have not dealt with this. Can any of you ladies shed light for me on why these men do not hold these lazy good for nothing idiots accountable for their kids? They are part of the problem because these sorry good for nothing BM's know that someone else will take up their slack. Don't get me wrong, I am a BM as well as a SM, but I am referring to the stereotypical lazy, tramps self entitled, " always trying to stay in his life somehow" type BMs.