Wow......last week really sucked! Forgive the long post, you can skip to the end if you'd like.

We were in an Ex-Parte hearing last Thursday. The BM, SD13's attorney and my H and I were present. Let me say right now, Judge Judy (not the real Judy, just my nickname) does not like BM at all. She's impartial and does not play favorites, because she lets H know when he's out of line. The Judge also called in SD's therapist as a witness.

SD's attorney gave a breakdown of events, siting my H was very ANGRY. She used this word about 1,000 times to describe H. Of course, she never met him and her impressions of him were from SD and BM, who both act like they're 13 (even though one of them is 40). And of course their two unforunate conversations on the telephone, where she caught him at his worst.

Judge Judy then called the therapist (I'll call her Sally). Sally revealed:

1. SD had been purposely not cooperating with us, and flat out refused our help to adjust to the new situation and settle into our home.

2. SD refused Sally's suggestions that SD & H get some family counseling so they can learn to communicate. And in fact fought her on this issue during their weekly sessions.

3. Sally finally told H she couldn't move forward with SD because of their communication issues, and H agreed to take SD to family counseling (let me just say he would have done this earlier if SD had allowed Sally to say anything to H. Sally only said something because this problem was hindering her progress with SD).

4. When Judge Judy asked if H had taken her, Sally was forced to answer that SD ran away to BM's house on the same day as their first appointment. H and I ended up taking the next appointment. SD still has not cooperated in attending.

5.The Judge asked Sally if SD had purposely failed her classes in school. Sally told the Judge that SD had specifically told her if she failed 7th grade H would be forced to let her go live with BM because he couldn't cut it as a Dad.

6. The Judge flat out asked Sally if SD had been manipulating this situation so she could get what she wanted, instead of working with H and me. Sally said....well manipulate is a strong word. Judge Judy said....I know that...now did she or didn't she? Sally said....she worked very hard in getting the outcome she wanted instead of working with her BF and SM.

7. Judge Judy then said she'd be using another strong word....sabotage. Did Sally believe BM was sabotaging H and my efforts in helping SD settle into our home. Sally's reply....I don't want to comment on that.

8. Finally, Sally told Judge Judy that H and I had done everything possible to help SD. That SD had been stubborn and refused to work with us on every level. That H had made heroic (her words) efforts in getting SD the help she needed to succeed. SD simply refused all help made available to her.

SD's attorney was sitting fairly close to BM during the proceedings. Until it was revealed that BM was undermining our efforts in providing a stable environment for SD. So suddenly I notice her inching and shifting away from BM to try and distance herself from her.

Oh....and Judge Judy threatened to have BM arrested for contempt of court. Seriously....she was constantly interrupting the Judge during the proceedings and the Judge finally said.....If you say one more word, I will call in a deputy sheriff, have him escort you downstairs and you will be arrested for contempt of court.

SD has been living with BM since last Wednesday. The Judge allowed her to have temp custody, rather than putting her into foster care. BM was court ordered to drive in every school day (tomorrow is the last day of school), walk SD into the office and check her in because each time SD skipped school, BM was involved in some way, shape or form. BM was also court ordered to enroll SD in summer school to make up for the 7th grade classes she failed. BM was also ordered to bring SD into her counseling sessions and attend them with SD. H was ordered to get some family counseling to help with his frustration and obvious anger over this situation. We were all ordered to see the same family counselor.

H has been a stand up guy through this process. He said that he knows his daughter is in there somewhere, and hopefully he'll see her again. We're both angry, hurt and feeling so disappointed in SD, who was a willing participant in bringing us down. With the help of her Skank of a BM. The last two years have been absolute hell and this entire time I kept thinking...poor SD. She drives me crazy but it's not her fault her BM is so messed up, she just wants to believe in her BM. Well....BULLS**T! She was behind this all the way. I told H that I do not want to see her for a while, but agreed to have her with us during Father's Day weekend. Otherwise, keep that manipulative little b***h away from me.

H and I are headed into counseling this week. We're both doing single sessions, then we'll start having sessions together. This counselor will also be seeing SD and her BM, maybe, if BM follows through. Otherwise, she already told us we don't need marriage counseling. But we will need help with the transition and getting over the betrayal of SD. The nice thing is this counselor is also a SM! We saw her once already, and she let me know she totally understood my feelings. How cool is that??

Thank you for letting me unload. Especially since it's so long. And this was the short version!!