The spermIdiots are crawling out of their hole again ................. let the games begin!
All,
Well it starts ....................... again! It is time to make reservations for winter visitation. SpermIdiotGrandMa is once again taking the lead in setting up visitation and is once again applying creative logic and mathematics to determining who pays what.
To get my SS from school to them, them to us and us back to school is the goal from our perspective. Apparently from theirs it is to creatively figure out how to not have to pay half.
The judgement is pretty clear. "Each party will be responsible for getting the child to their location." Sounds pretty simple right? Apparently not. SpermIdiotGrandMa has decided that since there are three legs in the trip that they are only responsible for one third of the cost. Historically the cost has been split down the middle because buying a single round trip ticket is cheaper than buying two one ways. Still sounds pretty reasonable right? Stay tuned it gets fun in a minute.
The new logic is that with three legs to buy that they should only have to pay to get the Skid from school to them. Still sounds reasonable right? Now, that leaves us with two thirds of the cost since once he gets to them we have to get him to us and then back to boarding school. Still has the ring of reasonableness right? One would think but one would be wrong.
SpermIdiotGrandMa has decided that the discount for the multi leg trip should be applied to their section because "you put him in boarding school". So with SpermIdiotMathmatics they end up paying significantly less than a third of the cost much less half. I love this shit! It is so much fun once again holding up the mirror so that once again they will have no choice but to recognize that they are IDIOTS. Our response was that we will agree to the logic that the multi leg discount should be distributed fairly but since "they" only want to pay for one of three legs that they get no multi leg discount since they are not participating in the cost for multiple legs. Using her logic the discount should only apply to the party covering more than one leg since it is a "multi leg discount". She just about went ballistic on that one.
Our answer to the "you put him in boarding school" comment ........ your worthless POS son bears no cost for the amazing opportunity that we gladly provide for our son ................. and he has to send his SpermIdiotMommy to quibble about a couple hundred dollars in air fair? Laugh, Laugh, Laugh. And they get madder and madder and madder as we laugh out load. (of course we did not use any profanity or refer to them directly as the "SpermIdiots" but it was most assuredly implied".
Our stance is this. They can pay either the one way ticket price to get them from school to them or half of the total. Either way our cost is several hundred dollars more than "theirs". They can pay either half of the total or the one way cost to get him to them. We do not care. The difference in cost is negligible from our perspective. Either way we pay far more than half of the total travel costs. $50.00 dollars for them is apparently enough to push them in to bankruptcy.
So now for the really fun part. She says "I will ask SpermDad how much he is will to help with the ticket price". WTF is that crap? It is is his #~$(!#& visitation. He has never paid a dime in travel costs, his SpermIdiotMommy does it for him. In fact until direct payroll withholding for CS wend in to effect he never paid a dime in CS. SpermIdiotMommy and SpermIdiotDaddy paid it for him. And now his other three out of wedlock spawn live with the SpermIdiotGrandParents and he gets the tax break for them. AND HE DOES NOT PAY A DIME TO SUPPORT THEM! What the hell does she mean "ask him if he is willing to help with the ticket"? She definitely spawned an idiot and contributed mightily to his idiocy. Three generations of complete inability to make a good decision all culminating with her IDIOT son. Selective breeding at its finest.
Now during this process, she called the Skid and told him that since "we" are not willing to be reasonable that they cannot afford to see him this winter and that if they cannot just pay ~$250.00 that it would cost $100.00 a day or more to see him and that is too much.
What the hell kind of message does that send to a kid? You are not worth $100.00 a day? ASSHOLES!
If it was going to cost me $1000.00 to spend one day with my kid I would pay it gladly. They are quibbling over $50.00 - $130.00. She clearly told him that he was not coming to them for winter visitation so we bought round trip tickets from school to us and back. Now SpermIdiotGrandMa is pissed that we are not working with them on this and that they will take the missed time added to a future visitation. The county rules and judgement are very clear. Visitation is use it or loose it and not a pool to draw from at will. When we read her the rules she once again went ballistic. And .......... once again I enjoyed every minute of playing her and her son for idiots they are.
However I have to admit that if repeatedly baring their idiocy was not one of my favorite hobbies these people could really piss me off.
More to come as events unfold I am sure.
Best regards,
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Comments
Good On You
That's fantastic that you stuck to your guns no matter what. Good on you for proving that they surely are idoits.
My SS BM wouldn't travel an extra 10min in her car to see her children after not seeing them for 2 weeks over the christmas break last year, and her pathetic excuse was because when BF and I picked the skids up from her house 2 weeks prior on XMas day I was in the car and to her that is a big no no. So she decided that she will not be driving any extra (which was really half way as stated in mediation) to see HER children she will wait another week. Worse still SS13 asked why mum doesn't want to see them and I told him that she didn't want to drive to pick them up but to ring her himself if he didn't believe me. 1 point to BM, she didn't lie to him, she told him she wouldn't drive the extra 10min because his father had me in the car on pick up. How pathetic can these BMs be, grow up!
But then they have the nerve to say 'you are not my childs mother', well maybe if they started acting like better mothers we would have to step in to help these skids.
The latest round just concluded.
SpermIdiotGrandMa just called to tell my lovely bride that the Skid not visiting SpermIdiotDad is all Lovely Bride's fault because we wont pay to subsidize SpermDads visitation ???????????????????? Ha! this is getting fun.
In a fit of benevolence my Lovely Bride ran the cost distribution so that SpermDad will only have to cover the cost to get Skid from school to him. She even agreed to that distribution. And SpermIdiotGrandMa changed the rules once again. "Well, we should only have to pay what it would have cost for half of the airfare from your home to us not from Boarding School to us". At that point my Lovely Bride went off. "YOU should not be paying for anything, your son should be paying for his share of his son's costs not you!". SpermIdiotGrandMa: "you always bring that up .......". Wife: "That is because it is fact."
Sooooooo ............. once again my wife was forced to go back to strict application of the Terms and Conditions outlined in the Judgement. SpermGrandMa once again went nuts. Lovely Bride rolled up the Judgement and started pummeling SpermIdiotGrandMa about the head and shoulders with it.
SIGM pulled out the lawyer card "I talked to a lawyer and you have been screwing us out of visitation. Skid should be traveling on your time and not on ours".
Wife: "First, you do not have visitation your Son does. Second, if you actually talked to a lawyer and are confident that the last two Judges got the situation so wrong then feel free to go back to court. But, keep in mind that it has been 5 years since the last support review and by my calculations using the new state support calculations guidelines DickHeads (Rags poetic license not actual term used) CS will increase by ~$120/mo. And you obviously did not show the judgement to the lawyer you talked to because the Judgment is crystal clear that travel is on DickHeads time."
Judgement: "Visitation will begin on the first day indicated and the child will return to (Mom) by the end of the last day indicated."
SIGM: "Are saying I did not talk to a lawyer?"
Wife: "Did those words come out of my mouth? I was very clear, if you are so confident in your legal options feel free to take us to court."
SIGM: Dead and very uncomfortable silence................ "Well you buy the ticket or not, it is up to you but it will be you denying Skid time with his Dad ............ CLICK"
Now things got a little hairy in the Rags household. Lovely Bride "Z'd" out and started losing touch with her very logical self. "She is putting this on me, it is my fauld and I am the bad guy" I finally had to step in to the rant, tell her to SHUUUUUSH and inform her that it is on her only if she lets it be on her. DickHead and the SpermIdiotGrandMa are the ones who do not want to see the Skid they just feel guilty about it and want Lovely Bride to be the bad guy.
I caught some heat because of the Shuuuuuuuush and calling Bull Shit on Lovely Bride but my stepping in got her refocused on the facts and reality.
We just got off the phone with Skid to let him know that we were still trying to get Winter travel worked out but that the SpermIdiots (no derogatory term is ever used in reference to "Them" in conversation with Skid) were having hard time paying their share and that he might just come home for Christmas instead of going for his usual SpermTime. Skid indicated that SpermIdiotGrandMa had already called him to tell him that it was to expensive to fly him out and he also indicated that he would rather just come home anyway.
Soooooooo ........................ the WackyWitch was once again just trying to convince herself that my wife is evil and to lay the guilt on my wife rather than on her SpermIdiotSon. She had already told Skid that he was not coming but rather than informing my wife the decision she felt bad that the combined resources of the SpermIdiots are not enough to cough up less than a $100.00 to spend time with Skid and wanted to crank my wife up. Which unfortunately she succeeded at least for a while.
Hmmmmmmmmm! Even when we win we lose. And by having to have anything to do with the SpermIdiots the Skid looses.
More as events unfold.
Best regards,
I really feel your pain in all of this, Rags
The cheap-ass money nonsense that constantly goes on when it comes to seeing the kids. I cannot for the life of me believe that people would fight over the cost of seeing their own child, but indeed it happens, and leaves me shocked and appalled each time I hear about it.
So in light of your own frustrating situation, you'll appreciate this...
My oldest SD is away at college in DC. We are in PA. DH pays for ALL SDs tuition (50K/yr), plus all incidentals, plus CS for the other 2 SDs at over 3600/mo, plus their private school tuitions, plus all activites, etc...(you get the picture). POS BM pretty much pays for nothing when it comes to the girls- and she doesn't work.
Yet DH called his POS ex to discuss how they were going to work out the financial arrangements of SD coming home for the upcoming holidays (both by bus and train). Well POS BM, as usual, cried poormouth, and said that DH would just have to pay for the whole amount for SD to come home- even though, of course, SD would spend half her time with POS BM.
This is our life. At this point, my DH is so stressed out about so many other things, he doesn't have the time or energy to fight it. And the POS BM knows it. And so she gets away with it each and every time.
So again, I truly feel your pain!
"If you have never been hated by a child, you have never been a parent."
-Bette Davis
they don't really care
the "sperms" that is..........if they did, they would have tried some thing a bit more logical, like SAVING UP, for Christmas visitation. It comes around every year, with plenty of time to stash away some $$ in anticipation of the visitation....OH, I forgot, that is to easy for some people!!! My EX and I do "long distance" visitation as well. We communicate to eachother, stick to a plan, split it down the middle, and PLAN AHEAD! We do this because we care about our kids, this is for them, not us. ( by that I mean being nice to eachother to ensure to show them a better way...I hope that makes sense.) Rags....it must be so fustrating for you and your wife to have your plan in action, and be ready to do what you need to, and have the "moron twins" ( sorry, gettin creative myself) screw it up, and cause distress."~waiting on the world to change~"
I know about that extra money
I know about that extra money because we are the dad side that got screwed in court. We lost a couple of weeks in summer, but gained some time in being able to pick SS up from school on our weekends (SS lives about 1 hour away and normal drop off is 20 minutes away). Well, we can't always afford to go get him from school so I/we have decided about once a month we will find the money. In a 9-month school year, we get about 24 *bonus* awake hours. To us, the cost and time of travel is worth it. Also with the new paperwork, SS doesn't get to see his brother for about a month surrounding brother's birthday...
Hence the *bonus* time has come to our advantage. It states very clearly that we may pick SS up from school on our weekends. It also states very clearly that Mother's Day holiday starts at 6pm. Our weekend always falls on Mother's Day holiday. This gives me a chance to get my boys together for some *special bonus time* for BS's birthday since SS cannot attend anymore and BS's birthday always falls right after Mother's Day.
It may be a financial struggle to get SS, but we wouldn't ever trade that time for more money!!!
The investment is worth it.
Nette,
Though we are the custodial Bio-Mom side of our blended family equation I can see the travesty of justice that tends to land on non-custodial Bio-Dads.
It seems that nearly every blended family situation has one side or the other that is focused on their own interest and being in control rather than the best interest of the kid(s).
If Bio-Dad in our case would step up, contact his kid and my wife to take a participatory interest in SS's life I would have no problem offsetting some of his costs for visitation. However, he is nearly a non entity and he and his Mother (BioPaternalGrandMa) only enterface to throw flaming turds at my wife.(figuratively of course)
Fortunately for my SS and apparently yours, at least one side of their blended family is commited to including them and take whatever effort is neccessary to do so. Over the years my SS has come to realize that though he has rules in our home, it is his home and we will always support him and guide him to the best of our ability. He sees and comments on the diametric differences between his full time home (his home with Mom and I) and the chaos and poor judgement present in his visitation home.
I am sure your SS sees the commitment and care from you and his Dad.
Good luck and best regards,