The double standard that seems to prevail is one thing, but the lies are quite another. Early on in our relationship dh lied about several big things regarding bm and ss, thus I have always been apprehensive to say the least when it comes to trusting him.

I believed we had turned a corner and things were greatly improving... Until this morning. I check our bank statement daily, as we are on a budget and the holidays are coming. I notice a charge of $30 for books at a bookfair at ss's school.

Quick background: My bios had their conferences and bookfair a few weeks ago. They were told if they wanted anything from the bookfair they would have to use their own allowance money. Fair enough. They complied, everyone got what they wanted, all is good.

Dh and I had discussed that if kids, any of the kids wanted something personal and it's not a holiday/birthday they need to use their own allowance. It's a good lesson. They learn the value of a dollar and commerce. And all the kids do chores for their allowance, including ss.

Well special snowflake did NOT have to use his own money for the bookfair. Dh shelled it out. 30$ is not a huge deal what is, is the lie! Dh told me ss used his own money for the bookfair. But when I checked, he didn't! SS had $60 in his bank as of Monday! I know because we counted it all out together. And it's still there!

So why lie dh? Why can't you just tell me the truth? The rules don't apply to your precious child of divorce, only to mine. SS cannot be expected to have to comply because Disney daddy won't allow it.

I am livid! I called him out while he was in the shower this morning, so he couldn't escape. He still tried to lie until I told him I checked the kid's bank. Money still there. Then the old defensive dh playbook went into full mode. Deflect, blame, victimize. Needless to say I am left cold by this... What kind of marriage is it when you have to question everything for fear of the lies? Oh wait, it isn't a marriage at all... It's a joke.