I feel guilty over the way I behaved last time SS13 was at mine and DH's home. It is silly I know, but when he blatantly disobeyed our previously agreed upon rules (for the third time, the other two times I spoke to him about it and left it be) I sort of lost it. On top of the agitation I already had, DH made me out to be some kind of Nazi about the rules. I explained that this had been a repeated issue and that when I spoke to SS about the previous two infractions, he said he would not do it again, then did. I explained that this made it seem as if he didn't feel he had to obey the house rules and that by under minding me in front of SS, DH had reinforced that. DH says that not all rules have to be 100% and punished every time. Even after I told him about the history of it, he maintained that I was exaggerating. We agreed on the "house rules" together and that they were reasonable expectations of a 13 yo. Now when I say they need to be enforced I'm a "Nazi" as DH put it. I don't know what to do. I don't go after every little thing or even participate in discipline. The extent of my involvement is, "Take your plate to the sink," and, "it's bedtime." I've never been strict. Should I totally disengage?