I just wanted to get some advice from people out there...My Dh has three kids. SS17 lives with us full time-has since he was 12. BM sees him every other weekend. The other 2 sd11 and ss9 we have every other week from monday to monday. I also take them on BM's days. She drops them before school and picks them up from me on her way home from work. The times she sint working, i still take them so she can save on gas... What we have come to realize is that money (cs) is the root of all evil. My ex and us share my bio-son 50/50-monday to monday schedule. neither one of us pay any cs. My DH carries him on his insurance. We split any out of pocket medical/dental expenses (if they cost enough to bother) And extra cirricular activities (soccer, karate etc) when they come up. We get along wonderfully. He has his life and we have ours. I have no idea how much money my ex makes? and the same goes for him. DH and his ex were fighting in court about a year ago. She said she was making so little that even with all of our parenting time, she was entitld to child support(her average parenting time for all 3 totalled 34%). (She also has a live in BF who works full time to help her out) So our point was, well if we are going to pay all that money every month, then you can find daycare for the kids on your parenting time? Is this wrong of us? Then DH feels guilty because his kids are having to sit in day care after school etc. Anyway, she agreed that we would forget about the child support(after she saw how much day care would cost her). She uses the younger two on her taxes (even tho we have more parenting time) We all sat down and agreed that we would each take care of them on our own time and split any out of pocket med expenses (like we do with my ex) But, that hasn't happened. We ended up paying the whole dental bill for ss17 wisdom teeth which was $1300. We pay for ss9 meds every month which are $50. I have a file filled with medical/dental bills that add up to about $3-4k. If they dont get paid, my H is the one on the line and the one who gets sent to collections etc. She will not take them to the doctor or dentist. She says she cant take off of work. And literally, the kids wont get taken. So we do it-we are not going to allow our kids to have ongoing conditions or problems. We are the ones who end up paying the copayments, picking up the RX and paying for that etc. Are we in the wrong to think that she should help pay for those things? Since we arent paying child support? She works at a temp agency so we never know how mcuh she is making. It depends on what that particular employer pays for the job. I am starting a job on Monday. We will still be taking the kids before and after school on her days for her. She asked DH why I was getting a job. He explained that she stiffed us with the dental bill, and the driving school bill that she told us she would help with. And DH's wages are being garnished for an old home phone bill the two had together years ago and a dental bill for the children that we couldnt afford to pay. Her response was "at least your wages aren't being garnished for child support" Yes, we could sue her in court for half of the bills. But, do we bother? Starting another war with her and her BF and putting the kids in the middle of it? Or do we just do what we need to do to take care of our kids and know that we are doing right by them? Besides, she would just quit her job so we couldn't get the money and then go after child supprt from us.