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Here we go again

Notgoodenough's picture

Well $7000 down the drain because dh doesn't understand that just because bm can not give sb everything we can does not make her a bad bm. Now don't get me wrong dh in my option should have sd all the time bm has issues but dh can't prove them. Sd states she likes it how it it is she is 11. Leave it alone quit putting the rest of us out because you feel bad for your kid. Oh yah not to bring up the judge hates you. Bm checked herself into mental hospital, cousin ods and dies in home but sd was with us when it happened and attendance is average with 10-15 missed days a year if you can keep your grades up. So tried of you push sd back on me for school and girls stuff because bm will not do it and I have girls of my own. God love dh he is a great dad and stepd to my kids and I try the same with sd but bm is a b####. My kids bd just doesn't extist so dh has no ideas what sharing siks is like. It sucks. Everything can not be the same for all kids when some kids you have 24/7 and another you have every other week. Not to mention you pay child support. I know she is your pride and joy but come on $7000 for nothing but a support increase just stop already. Over it.

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Notgoodenough's picture

Sd stayed with us for 10days plus our normal parenting time. Her counselor gave her a signed paper saying bm was compliant with meds and could resume her aloted parenting time.

Disneyfan's picture

Based on what you posted, SD should be with her dad fulltime. Hopefully he's willing to fight to the very end to ensure she is in a safe, secure environment.

Just because an 11 year old likes something, doesn't mean adults should just accommodate them. If the kid decides she doesn't like having you and your kids around, are you going to move out? Of course not.

It's crazy to think a step parent will be content to leave his bio kid with unfit parent while he's stuck with several SKs full-time.

Notgoodenough's picture

We fought to the end there's nothing more to do but waste money if sd wants to stay where she is. Apparently it is okay to do what ever you want as long as the child is not with you and grades are good. As for dh being stuck with sks well my kids treat dh better then sd does. Sometime s there is just nothing else you can do the courts are reto active not proactive and sd is a good kid. Just tired of filling the gaps and dh getting screwed. Currently bm works 2-10pm sd goes to school 7-2:20 at which time bm Gbm picks up sd for the night. If sd has hw issues she call dh for help. Bm wakes sd up at 11pm. Sounds like a negative change in sd life but again is not an issue because sd grades are good. Sd cried when dh told her everything was staying the same. Nothing we can do if sd will not tell guarditum that she wants it to change. Sd is very add ament she doesn't want to pick she wants both parents.

Disneyfan's picture

Can you imagine what it must feel like for a parent to send his kid to a home he know isn't safe, while at the same time providing a safe environment for his SKs? That would eat me up inside.

Notgoodenough's picture

That is part of the problem I know sd should be with dh and it bothers dh that he is closer to sks then bd. dh stands his ground on so many things. Sd is bm only family other then Gbm that interacts with bm. Dh had 2 different bm family members say they would support dh having sd full time. It didn't matter. Nothing seems to matter because when things really bad happen sd is with us. No harm done. Crazy that dh has to send her back and wait an see but at what cost. We have called CPS apparently it is not an unsafe environment.