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The "perfect" parent

newbiemommy's picture

Submitted by newbiemommy on Tue, 09/20/2011 - 1:01pm

Does anyone else notice that when it comes to skids the world demands perfection. If its our own its assumed that we will make mistakes but with skids we are supposed to by osmosis be these perfect parent figures. How dare we get annoyed, we must never lose our temper, we must put up with any bad behavior they may throw our way, we must never need a break, our patience will be limitless, we can never disciple, we must never point out bad behavior, we must have unconditional love for them even if we will never get it back. In many cases we are around them as much as our own children or at least a great deal and yet we must always keep our perfect Sparent face on. If anything should happen we instantly become these horrible people. I think if anything steps deserve EXTRA grace. Its no easy task we are asked to take on.

Comments

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Tue, 09/20/2011 - 1:35pm

So true.

However, it is a two way street. Many expect SKs to be perfect as well. Many of us get annoyed when our SKs do things that we wouldn't blink an eye at if done by our BKs.

foxymama87's picture

Submitted by foxymama87 on Tue, 09/20/2011 - 1:43pm

AMEN!

TryingSoHard's picture

Submitted by TryingSoHard on Tue, 09/20/2011 - 1:43pm

Yes, I've noticed this. Just had a conversation with BF about it last night. I've given countless hours, endless energy and sacrificed much of myself to make these kids comfortable, and that's never been noticed... it's just assumed that I'm supposed to be perfect. I've never gotten a word of appreciation or thanks from BM or from BF's family, but when things are less than perfect, it's "how dare you not let step kids walk all over you! I knew you couldn't do it right!"

THANK YOU, Disney cartoons for giving stepmoms such a great name.

SteppingUp's picture

Submitted by SteppingUp on Tue, 09/20/2011 - 3:05pm

Not the steal your blog and take it in a different direction, but this totally reminded me of this awesome article I read about the expectations of teachers to be perfect:

http://www.examiner.com/k-12-in-topeka/in-what-other-profession?do_not_m...

Very similar to a stepparent's predicament, especially this part:

If a poverty-stricken, drug-addled meth-cooker burns down his house, suffers third degree burns, and then goes to jail; we don’t blame the police, fire department, doctors, and defense attorneys for his predicament. But if that kid doesn’t graduate high school, it’s clearly the teacher’s fault.