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Holiday of hipocrisy? Mothers day

MyMistake's picture

Submitted by MyMistake on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 3:14pm

Maybe I am the only one that feels this way, but every year I dread mothers day. Perhaps its because I have no bio kids of my own, or maybe because my skids are supposed to be my kids (because my husband is a widower) but for whatever reason it just feels like a sham to me, every year.

Everybody does whatever they want, take me to they places they like to go to and they might do one chore a piece for me. Sure, they don't let me "lift a finger" on Mothers Day, but its just the same, as now I have double work left for me on Monday. They kids give me an obligatory craft made at school with no ounce of sincerity and I have to be excited because if no t I hurt their feelings. Oh boy, can't wait.

Comments

SMof2Girls's picture

Submitted by SMof2Girls on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 3:17pm

Be proactive about it. Tell them exactly what you want to do on Mother's Day. It's your day, let them give you the choice.

I'm pretty indifferent to Mother's Day as well. My mom passed 13 years ago, so there's no real celebration in it for me. I have two skids, but no biokids, and they usually spend the day with their "real" mom.

LaMareOssa's picture

Submitted by LaMareOssa on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 3:37pm

I feel pretty indifferent as well. I can't remember ever getting anything from SD10 on mothers day and she was always with her "real mom" anyway. On a different note, I am a BM to DD6 and DS3. BD made something in school(kindergarten) and she is so excited about mothers day. lol Me? Not so much. SD won't be seeing her mother on Mothers Day this year so I'm not sure how thats going to go.....

imthewife's picture

Submitted by imthewife on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 3:47pm

I agree with you!

My SIL thinks she owns this damn holiday. They just built this new BBQ outside and are throwing the usual STUPID mother's day BBQ.

Excuse me...I do not want a burnt hamburger from my brother in law...nor do I want to sit around and hear all about "POOR SD19" who isn't with us because she is WITH HER MOTHER out of state...

Mother's Day should be planned by...MOM herself and no one else...

Good luck to you!

dadsnewwife's picture

Submitted by dadsnewwife on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 3:51pm

I agree with the OP. Be proactive and tell them what you want! I've suffered way too many disappointing Mother's Days in the past (mostly due to my ex who would say to me, "YOU'RE not my mother." So, I this year took matters into my own hands and told DD24 to get with DD20 and make reservations to wherever they want to take me on Mother's Day. Of course I'll have to pay, but whatever. I rarely see them even though they live close by, so I'm just happy to spend any amount of time with them. I've gotten much more vocal about my needs since I've gotten older and it's really empowering. I feel a little bad for DSS19 who really doesn't HAVE a mother and lives with us, but he's a guy and I didn't raise him, so doubt he cares at all. He's used to it just being him and his dad.

smdh's picture

Submitted by smdh on Fri, 05/11/2012 - 3:54pm

I used to hate it. I wanted to be a mother so badly and I was stuck with a skid (she goes to her mom's every mother's day, but still), then I lost a baby. It was AWFUL.

Now I have BS1 and I'm looking forward to a nice day. My dh's love language is service so I likely won't get anything more than a card (and I am perfectly fine with that - I'm not big on material items) but he will actually make an effort. He all ready asked what I want to do for the day. We're going to take a nice bike ride, hang out, and he's going to grill me a nice filet, probably whip up some garlic mashed potatoes, and veggies. It will be quiet and relaxing.

Then again, my dh helps out every weekend. He works so much during the week that on weekends, he plays Mr. Mom and begs me to relax.