You are here

What does DH do if BM's phone gets cut off every other month

mrsparks's picture

Submitted by mrsparks on Fri, 01/30/2009 - 4:21pm

DH hasn't talked to the SS in about a week, BM's phone got cut off which is nothing unusual, it's happened about 8 times in the past year. She doesn't have a house phone and is very controlling about the phone calls, she always has DH on speaker phone whether DH calls or she calls for the child and she will often hang up on DH saying SS is sleeping or in the shower when we know it's probably not true, we will be going to court for at least joint or full custody in about a month, doesn't BM have to keep an open line of communication??? What happens when she's this irresponsible she has 3 children and no phone!

Comments

stepmom929's picture

Submitted by stepmom929 on Fri, 01/30/2009 - 5:55pm

This is something you DEFINITELY want to write into the custody agreement. You need to write in how often she calls and how often you call. Of course there should be "wiggle room", but it is not acceptable that if her phone gets shut off that your husband can't have contact with his child. You need to make sure to put in the agreement so that if it continues you can do something about it, legally.

Anon2009's picture

Submitted by Anon2009 (not verified) on Fri, 01/30/2009 - 6:31pm

You might want to consider getting him a cell phone. If he's younger, they have cell phones out there for younger kids that have GPS tracking devices and where only the parents can control what numbers go into the phone. You could put your and DH's home #, BM's home #, your cell phone #s, BM's cell phone #, your work #s, BM's work #, grandparents' phone numbers, and the phone #s of other trusted adults whom SS can turn to in emergencies. Here's a link with some good cell phones for kids:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16044093/

We ended up getting my SDs regular phones, but with GPS on them so we know where they are. If SS is older, he could probably use a regular cell phone. I agree with stepmom929 that you definitely need to get something written about it in the custody agreement about when DH can call SS when he is with BM, and when BM can call SS when he is with DH. I suggest the cell phone idea, because a) even though BM's phone might be shut off, your DH still has a way of communicating with SS and 2) you can tell BM that when SS is with you, she's to call him at the court-ordered time on his cell phone and when she calls at that time and you hear it ringing, you can say, "SS, it's your mom" and you don't have to pick it up and talk to her.

Razamond's picture

Submitted by Razamond on Sat, 01/31/2009 - 7:07pm

I was reading one blog on here where the DH couldn't reach the skids because BM's phone was off (happened on a regular) so he would call the sheriff and ask them to do a welfare check because he had no heard form the kids for two days and could not reach them - phone was turned off. This was great ammo for the court hearing. My DH has decided to do the same because yeah we have that same piece of crap BM that most all of us on here have - no home phone, cell phone turned off or refuses to let skids call/answer when DH calls.