I think the problem with H and I is that we were both so accustomed to our single lifestyles (i.e. parenting styles, personal finance management, etc.) for so long that we are having a very hard time with the concept of marriage and living together. We are really NOT "partners" - none of our finances are joint, none of our purchases are joint, we even have different ideas and approaches to how the children should be parented!

I do recall that some of the happiest times of our relationship were before we were married when we lived separately. When we didn't see each other everyday we actually missed each other, there were no financial differences because we each managed our own household finances, and we didn't have all of the blended family challenges we do now because he visited with and parented his children in his home and I did the same in mine.

Right now I am really missing those days and wondering if it is at all possible to get them back? I'm thinking NOT in my case simply because in the past I began to suggest it and before I could even get it out H shot it down as an option. Sad part is the main reason we moved in together and got married was so we could share parenting and finances - the VERY THINGS that are tearing us apart now!

I have heard of people living separately and making it work. Does anyone know of any success stories personally? What do you think of the concept in general?

Googled "married living apart" and there are some interesting articles and comments...