So my younger sister is getting married in August. Indecisive isn't a strong enough word and I'm a Libra (she's an Aries if it matters to anyone).

I'm MOH and have had to be the push to get this thing moving in some kind of direction. So far she:

Has a groom. Check.

Has a dress. Double Check.
-Sidenote on the dress, she first tried her dress on and thought it was "the one".She tried another dress on and it made her question the dress she ended up choosing. My mom and gram were all gung-ho for the dress she ended up choosing, but I told her a. she should have stopped there and b. if she no longer wanted the first dress we could keep looking, it was the first day we went wedding dress shopping. My mom and gram ended up accusing me of trying to "make this about me" and make her choose the second dress because it's something I would have wanted. *eyeroll* it made the rest of the evening just about unbearable because whatever nonsense my mother spews my gram eats up and regurgitates. THEY were pressuring her. Not me. My sister of course, says nothing to either of them about their behavior.
-My sister tried the dress on during a "flash sale" which meant that it was half off- it would have totaled $450 off the rack. She thought she wanted a white one (this was off white) until she saw it online and decided it looked too winter-y for her summer wedding. She told my dad it was $450. He offered to pay for the dress in full (my sister is footing the bill for this wedding mostly). When they found out it was only half off for the weekend she tried it on=the dress went back up to full price. She put a down payment on it anyway and my dad had a CONNIPTION. He is police and about to retire-I don't see what all the fuss is about-he ended up covering half. *eyeroll*

Bridesmaid's dresses. Check.
-Now that my step sister finally got measured (after bugging her for 2 months) and talked my parents into paying for her dress.

Has a venue, caterer, DJ AND a $5000 photographer.
-We live in po-dunk. The venue is the local firehouse which is nothing special-but I'm confident enough in my pinteresting abilities that we'll be okay. The venue was $600. I don't care HOW good that photographer is-there is only so much you can do in that space. My college roommate had an all out super expensive wedding last fall and her photographer didn't cost that much.

Here's what she hasn't done:
Decided whether or not she wants the church in town (my gram talked to the pastor and they would let her get married there without being a member) or her groom's parent's property (which is half junkyard that they promised to clean up-needless to say this isn't promising and NOW all of a sudden she's worried about rain).
She hasn't sent out save a dates that were supposed to be out in March.

Finalized a guest list with addresses to send Save the Dates because her Groom won't get addresses for people in his extended family.
-Guess what? I stole the ones she had filled out from the addresses she did have out of her room today and mailed them. Muahahaha.

She hasn't ordered official invites.

She hasn't hired a bartender (trust me there needs to be one-even if I hire them and call them "my assistant" for the day).

Meanwhile she's still trying to decide what she wants the Groom and Groomsmen to wear or ordered any of the damn decorations. She is counting on my Dad to have his 1980's chevvy whatever ready for the wedding and I took a gander at it today.........

I'm calling limo companies tomorrow about prices. OR else we're riding in on Llamas.

AND I started brainstorming a seating chart because I do know our (rather large) immediate family will be attending and got into it with my mom because she doesn't want to sit with my gram and our elder family folk because she wants to sit with her friends and drink which really really really offended my gram who walked in on our "discussion".

OH and my parents are vehemently divorced. My mom has already threatened but punch my Dad's girlfriend (who he cheated on my mom with) if she so much as looks at her new husband. *eyeroll*. That whole situation is contentious and my paternal Uncle and his wife (my aunt) are seated with the rest of the paternal family and apparently THAT is going to be a huge issue for my aunt (who I also seated back to back & in between her two daughters at the table directly behind that one. My Uncle is going to want to sit with his mother and how am I supposed to separately seat husband and wife? I also have maternal Uncle who is a rowdy drunk. My sister is super concerned about this. SO has agreed to deal with him for her if need be.

I'm frustrated and exhausted-all these piddly fighting things make me kind of sad for her. Every time I joke that "i'm eloping" I get met with "Why the hell would you get married? You'd better not." There's nothing wrong with my SO-he's just not my ex who came with a loaded mommy.

Now I am seriously going to elope when the time comes. I don't want any of them anywhere near me.

UGHHHHH