I found this site yesterday after doing a google search on what to do with a 13 year old girl thats acting out sexually (more on that later). Where do I start. Okay, I'm 24 married to a man 18 years my senior. There are 5 children in our home. SS17, SD13, SD12 and our 5 month old twins. SS17 and SD12 do not belong to DH, only SD13 does. SS17 and SD12 are the siblings to SD13. All three of them have different fathers. Last spring, we allowed SS17 to come up and stay with us as he was having behavioral issues in school and DH and I felt he needed structure and a strong male influence. It was supposed to be temporary. SD13 and SD12 came up after BM got evicted from her home. That was also supposed to be temporary. So after a month of marriage, I suddenly had 3 skids, one only 6 years younger.

A lot of people tell me when I complain is "Oh, you knew he had kids bla bla bla" Yes. But DH never had custody of them before. We still have nothing legal, she just dumped em on us and went about her life. Now that shes back on her feet, she got herself a one bedroom apt and is thoroughly enjoying her party life (Not unlike Casey Anthony, she added Luvn Life as a signature to her texts).

The skids were a handful when we got them. BM is total trash. For example, before SS17 came up, he had to sleep on the couch because his stepdad was sleeping in his bed, because BMs new boyfriend was sleeping with her. Nice. They just tried to push boundaries to see what they could get away with. Not much. They even had CPS called on us because we told them if they didnt clean their rooms in our new house, they would sleep in a tent. And they did. SS12 and SS13 are so very starved for attention, and their school counselor, very nice but naive will listen to them for hours. Let me tell you, those girls know how to play an audience. Anyway CPS came out and we explained the situation, and the lady actually reprimanded the kids for not keeping their room clean after all that we've done for them.

They all call me mom to my face, at their request, not mine, and to most of our immediate family. BM did not like that at ALL. I understand it, they want so bad to be part of a "normal" family with one mommy and one daddy.

I have a love-hate relationship with them. Sometimes they can be very helpful. SD12 likes to clean and organize, SD13 was a huge help when the twins were born, I was sad to see her go back to school, SS17 is a big boy and helps DH around the farm and stuff. But sometimes they really grate my nerves. I mean, they're old enough to be my siblings in a "normal" family. Sometimes I wish BM would wake up and take them back so I wouldnt have to deal with their problems. SD12 has a serious eating problem, she gorges herself, hides food, steals food, etc. I know there was an issue with food supply before, but they've been here a year and we havent run out of groceries once. SS17 lies and steals. Pathologically lies, just makes up crazy stories for absolutely no reason and steals cigarettes and anything thats not locked down. We dont lock our front door ever, but we have to keep our bedroom locked. SS13...woo boy. I dont know what to do about her. She reminds me so much of myself actually, that I wanna shake her. Shes shaken off the Boys-are-Icky mindset and has gone into full whore mode. It started with calls from the school saying she was overly affectionate to the point of getting a detention! Then yesterday I was going through her things since her friend had spent the weekend and I noticed her wearing makeup. They've stolen my makeup before, so I was just making sure they hadnt done it again. Not like I need a reason, 12 and 13 year olds dont have a right to privacy, I'm sorry. I'm glad I did, because I found a note addressed to SS17s friends from SS13 detailing what she was going to do to him behind the horses pen (oral favors!). I was in complete and utter shock. I had to tell DH of course, and he handled it badly I think from what he told me. I tried to have a talk with her today about how its not worth it at this age but I dont know how much of it got through.

I just really wish I didnt have to deal with all this