Birthday Crap....
So since BM asked SO for some money for a BDay party SHE planned for SD, this has been a touch subject for SO and I considering he has not freakin balls when it comes to "The Golden Uterus" aka BM. So, I typed up this letter in "hopes" perhaps he could retrieve his balls that the BM took and kinda set her straight in a not so mean and negative way. Anyway...I have not heard back from SO about the letter. I did NOT send the letter, I am hoping he will or at least stick up for himself.
BM,
I regret to inform you that at this time I can not provide any funds towards Rylie's Birthday Party you planned. I actually think you have alot of audacity to even ask me for any money at all. You planned this party yourself and you made sure you planned it on a day I was working. I asked of you could change it and you refused. I asked about guests and you did not reply. So why should I give you any money towards a party where I have no say in the matter, not to mention planned without my knowledge? Pretty gutsy move on your part don't you think? It is your party, you planned it, and you can pay for it. Perhaps if you had worked with me prior we could have worked something out but even so, that would have been a problem because you see, in the papers we are "suppose" to discuss anything when it comes to medical decisions with the kids. The decisions were suppose to be made 50/50. You however felt that you didn't have to discuss anything with me and turned around and put braces on SD that are pretty much for cosmetic reasons. You set up the payments and the appointment all without my knowledge and behind my back. If you would have just waited a month or so I could have at least paid my portion in full you didn't even inform me that the braces were going on and when. I am not prepared for this financial burden that you created. So in the mean time I will have to work more hours and you are going to have to pick up the slack with the kids.
Respectfully,
EXDH
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If your going for not
If your going for not negative I dont think this will work. It does sound like he is baiting her and wants to fight. I would be much more short and simple then that.
Dear EX,
I will unfortunately be unable to assist with D's bday party. Since I wasn't included in the planning, decision making, or guest list I assumed that you would be taking care of this party on your own. There is no room for it on my budget with this short notice. Maybe next time we can plan and pay for a party together. We can discuss it next year.
Respectfully,
EXDH
I agree with this shortened
I agree with this shortened version of the letter, its straight to the point but at the same time does not offer BM the opportunity to reply- there would be nothing left to say. Also if you send a longer letter it might give BM the impression that your DH sat down for a while and actually thought about what to write etc- almost like he feels the need to justify his actions.
We had a similar problem with BM last year- she asked DH to contribute towards SD6's flight ticket because BM and her new bf were taking SD and BM's 4 other kids on holiday. When BM asked my DH he originally said he would be able to contribute...I was furious. How could BM have the cheek to ask DH to pay towards a holiday that SD was going on with BM and her new bf. Im sorry but at the end of the day if we took SD on holiday we would not even think of asking BM to pay because it would be US taking her on holiday so WE should pay. If BM couldnt afford to pay then she would have to do what every other family has to do and save up until she can afford to go on holiday. When me and DH talked things through he realised BM was taking the piss so phoned her up and said he wouldnt be paying towards the holiday but would buy SD the things she needed for it eg new swimming costume, holiday clothes etc etc. BM then pulled the stunt of telling SD that because daddy wouldnt pay they cant go on an aeroplane holiday anymore and instead had to just go to a holiday resort in this country. Later DH found out that BM's godmother had actually paid for the holiday- so if DH had contributed it would have just been spending money for BM and her bf anyway!!!!!
SO won't even give her an
SO won't even give her an answer. He won't even flat out tell her N-O! I have no clue why he is so ball-less around this dingbat. I'm at the point that I may just throw in the towel very soon.
Is your SO trying to stay out
Is your SO trying to stay out of court and play the "keep the BM happy to stay out of court" card?
Or maybe he doesn't even want to discuss it with her because it is a non-issue?
What does he say?
Did she write a letter to
Did she write a letter to request money? If not, why write a letter from dh to say "NO!"
He simply doesn't send money. If she plays the no response game why shouldn't he?
No money.
Not my party, not my checkbook.