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Oh to be FREEEEEE!!! Thanks to you all, I made the best decision ever.

meghuneyntyson's picture

I just wanted to make an open blog thanking everyone at this site. Seriously.

I came here a few days ago. Just a week into having my live-in boyfriend's son move in with us, I was miserable. The child had severe behavior problems. Aside from hitting my son and getting in his face and intimidating him to get what he wanted, he would blatantly ignore me, talk back and act like a wild animal. All this from a 5 year old.

When I met my BF, he was looking into getting full custody of his son and was an amazing presence in my own son's life. He seemed like such a great dad. Imagine my surprise when I witnessed his son's behavior and his behavior with his son.

When I went to his father about it, I was met with excuses until I finally requested that they BOTH move out to get these problems situated before we try to make a happy,blended family.

Today, BF stopped by with his son and nothing had improved. His son again ignored me and when I mentioned it to the father, he said "Well I'm not going to discipline him every time he ignores a stranger." Hmmm, a stranger he lived with...in MY home. I ended things and I couldn't be happier. I no longer feel uncomfortable and disrespected in my own home. I no longer worry about my son being intimidated and bullied in our own home.

The support and stories here have been fantastic help.

Comments

oneoffour's picture

Good for you!

A stranger? So his father allows him to live with a STRANGER? There is no logic there.

The man is in severe denial. And your son does not need this kind of influence in his life. I wish more mothers put the health and welfare of their kids first before hitching up with these 'amazing' men.

Onefootout's picture

Kicked him out after just a week? Good for you for not putting up with this for years and years. and enjoy your freedom!

meghuneyntyson's picture

No, you guys do! I read all the time how people wish they would have left earlier..before things get TOO complicated. And it really feels like a weight has been lifted off of me. My son feels much more comfortable and not worried/bullied - and that was my main concern...my son's welfare.

meghuneyntyson's picture

The week to me was pure torture. I would have let them stay longer if he was more open to working with his son on his behavior or backed me when I tried. But when I brought the issues to him day after day - he would do literally NOTHING. It was clear to me that they both had things they needed to work out together without the added stress of a new "stepmom" and "stepbrother".

And sure enough, once he moved out with his son, he began having even more issues. "I can't believe it. Jr. spit on the floor today." Smh. It further let me know that I made the right decision.

ctnmom's picture

See Meghun, I admire you so much. Because it's one thing to expose YOURSELF to a dysfunctional step situation, quite another to drag your poor innocent kid into it. Good for you for recognizing this situation was bad for YOUR child, who is your first priority. As much as I went trough with SS36 over the years, my kids ADORE him and he loves them back even more. He wouldn't been welcome in my home with MY kids any other way.Kudos to you! I can feel your sigh of relief too. Wink