I have been with my partner now for nearly 2 years- when I first met his son it was clear that something wasn't right with him! I have 2 older daughters 14 and 12 and my partners son is now 4- when we met he was 2, his only words were dada and 'loclate'. My step son spends 4out of 7 nights with his bm and the rest of the time with us!! I'm desperate for him to be diagnosed to get him some help but neither his bm or his dad seem capable of doing anything!! His list of symptoms is extensive - he tip toes when he walks, he hand flaps and recently has started contorting his hands to point in odd directions if you ask him a question. He has no idea of other peoples feelings - he very rarely reacts to pain like amy other child he walks into things all the time and falls over constantly!! He doesn't communicate well - he has a sing song voice that he uses most of the time and will repeat things that are being asked or he has seen on tv- he refuses to look you in the eye and if you ask him something he doesn't want to talk about he will contort his hands shut his eyes screw up his face and look to the ceiling!!! He is obsessed with food and must have breakfast as soon as he wakes up and lunch as soon as you say the word lunch - he can happily eat adult size portions and then finish whatever else anyone has left!! He says he wants to play with other children but when he's in that environment he doesn't actually play with them but plays by himself!! He can play for hours alone unsupervised! If he doesn't want to do something he will become over emotional and sobs uncontrolably - his dad was singing loudly the other day in a jokey voice which I could see was disturbing him, I asked his dad not to but he said I was being silly - within 10 minutes my ss was a sobbing mess and we were unable to calm him down for an hour!! I have an eight month old daughter - who was watching the tv the other day my ss came into the room where she was and tried to say good morning which is his usual practise - you must say good morning to him at least 3 times, because she didn't respond to him when I next looked he had both his hands on her shoulders and was trying to push her face to the floor- it was the first time he's been actually physical normally he gets emotional!!! When I told my partner he didn't believe me!! I feel I've been pushing and pushing to try and get him some help since we first met - trying to get him out of his unregistered childminders and into a Pre school in the hope that someone else there will pick it up, that failed he has been going to a nursery instead of Pre school where he mixes with children aged between 18 months and 5 years!! It's a busy nursery and one of the teachers actually told my partner if there was something wrong with him they would be unlikely to spot it as the age and capability range was very varied!! My partner and I had him for a lot of the time whilst j was on maternity leave and we were able to get him potty trained and then dry through the night but his bm doesn't want to deal with wet sheets so has put him back in nappies at bed time!! It's very confusing for him! Wheny partner questioned his ex wife about her thoughts she said she felt the same and had written a letter to her local peadiatrician - we checked into the process and for him to be diagnosed he needs to be refered by his gp! Surely if she was concerned she would have known this - she gave us a copy of the letter she says she sent it wasn't even a page long!! What more can I do for this boy - we did use charts to get him potty trained but my concern is what happens when he's not in our care!