Well, DH and I decided not to have kids, in part because we were pretty sure the response from his kids wouldn't be positive. I can tell you that recently, my OSD told me that her friend's dad and stepmom are pregnant, "And (friend) is NOT happy!" she said -- like it was totally obvious why, and like it was a no-brainer that she should be mad about it. I mentioned casually that her dad and I had had a conversation about having kids about a year ago, and SD very quickly said, "But you can't because dad had a vasectomy!" I said, "Yeah, but they can be reversed." Total silence.

I admit, I mostly did it to mess with her. And I did tell her that we decided not to. But it was interesting that she just assumed that it was not right for a stepmom and biodad to have kids together. I think that, had we decided to have kids, it would have been a tough road, because OSD is kind of a princess, and YSD is jealous enough of her older sister; bringing a baby into the mix would be one more person for her to feel replaced by.

Of course, probably every family's experience is different. I know I've read blogs on here by people whose stepkids really bond with the kids they have with their new spouses.

UCSM (BB)

"No matter how cynical I get, it's never enough." - Lily Tomlin

I had a miscarriage BUT...when we told SD we were pregnant she was really excited...she wants a baby sister SO bad. She was 9 at the time...she's 11 now and is really bummed to know I won't be having any more children. Her mom can't have anymore kids either so she's really disappointed about that whole thing.

BM cried her eyes out when she found out I was preg. and cheered when I lost the baby. Oh well!

~“For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone"~ Audrey Hepburn

When SS found out his dad and I planning to have a baby he made some pretty rude and hurtful comments. I won't say specifically what they were because I'm so paranoid about DH or BM recognizing me here, but suffice to say he was very inappropriate and should have been reprimanded by his dad. Of course he wasn't though. I wouldn't have told him anything, but I guess his dad wanted to prepare him. My SS is extremely demanding when it comes to attention, like nothing I've ever seen before, and I'm sure that has a lot to do with why he was so negative about the idea of having a baby around.

I think it depends on what kind of relationship you have with the skids. DH and I just popped the news to the skids last month when I was 16 wks and already showing quite a bit (I have a skinny frame to begin with). DH told them both over the phone before they arrived so their jaws wouldn't drop on the floor in front of us. SS25 was very happy for us. He and his GF gave us both hugs and congratulations and were eager to see the ultrasound pics. SD20 on the other hand wouldn't even look at me. No 'congrats', no acknowledgement whatsoever. I'm not even sure what she said to DH on the phone when he told her. This is our 2nd together. 3rd pregnancy tho. We lost #2 at 20 wks last December, so it's not like it should have been a HUGE surprise because they know we wanted to have another. I think it's just jealousy of her father moving on though. But my skids are adults, yours are younger, so it could be different.

But Congratulations!

SS was fine with it...I dont think boys care as much, but I don't know. We don't see him a whole lot though so that might have something to do with it. He's only met our son (16 months) twice.

"I child proofed my whole house, but they STILL get in!"

When DH and I got pregnant in Feb this passed year SD5,SD8,DS20 were very excited about it(even though DS20 told me the baby would be able to collect SS of me through the teenage years!!!LOL... I would be 40 by Due date)that's my kooky DS20!

DD15, was a little stand-offish at 1st. DD15 was not mad, just not excited which is unusual for her I'm sure it was a combination of many issue's with DD15.1st, she's having a very difficult time being a teenage girl 2nd She was out of State visiting my grandmother and the other kiddo's were here 3rd DS20 had just been stationed in Hawaii and leaving in 2wks.DD15 and DS20 have always been very close. I was married to BF 18 yrs. 4th it had only been a few yrs since the divorce, DD15 took it the hardest. Seems my poor DD15 felt all odds against her. It's very hard to see your little girl have a hard time cooping. DD15 is a very sweet,loving caring person. I'm SO PROUD SHE IS MY DD!!!

Once DD15 came home from Grandma's, it wasn't long b4 she 4got all about the worry of a new addition. She was just as excited and looking 4ward to it and just couldn't stop talking about "baby B this or baby S that"

SD4 and SD5 would kiss my belly, ask all the little curious questions, DS20 and DD15 couldn't stop talking about it with joy.... DH and I so excited about our 1st together, the bond of love even stronger between you! it was a very special 2wks for all of us as a blended family!

Unfortunately- I miscarried almost 2 wks after we found out, I was 8wks. DD20 and DD15 felt very bad about it, being older,they didn't ask the natural,curious questions a 4yr and 8yr old would. We explained to SD4 and SD8 the best way we could. Both of coarse were saddened and gave lots of hugs and kisses to BF and SM....

sometimes out of the blue, SD4 will say "Madilyn's baby is in heaven, but she's gonna have another one" just fills my heart with love how a precious child thinks in their little mind..

I think I was in shock. The hardest thing for me, was seeing my DH hurt so much. He took the loss so hard!

If your skids aren't ecstatic in the beginning, don't let that worry you.... It will problem bring u and skids closer during the pregnancy. The ultimate gift... you and DH are giving skids something in life they will thank you for one day!! Best wishes sweetie!

My SDs are only 3, 5, and 7 and I'm not sure when we will tell them that I'm pregnant. My biggest fear with this is that they will tell BM right away and it will cause a truck load of stress.

I was 12 weeks along when we told my SS, 10 at the time, and SD, 8 at the time.

They were very, very excited. SS wanted a boy; SD, a girl. SD started picking out crazy names -- "Zebedee," "Precious." Very fun.

We lost the baby, but my point is that if you're close enough to the kids, the reasons they might have problems with the news -- Will Daddy still love me as much? Will this child take my place? -- simply don't come into play as much because they're not insecure with the family dynamic. My husband was worried, let me tell you, but the kids came through, as usual.

Best of luck!

Congratulations first off. I have no Bio children yet but I'm hoping my skids will be alright with it when or if the time comes. I have a gut feeling my SD will have an issue with it. She tends to get pouty and moody if attention is not on her 100% of the time. With a new baby, most of the attention will be on him/her. So...good luck with that.

" Faith is a bird that feels dawn breaking and sings while it's still dark"-R.Tagore