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Why?!?

Lillywy00's picture

So remember in my last blog I said next weekend I was going to drop my kid off at college prep camp

and I'd have a kid-free plus dude-free weekend

Please tell me why, when I tried to give this dude the courtesy of informing him, HE FUCKING INVITED HIMSELF ALONG?!?

OMG 

FML!!!!!!!

Im gonna have a 15 day period and get a room with double beds. 
 

Comments

grannyd's picture

Poor Lilly!

Hon, you'll have to insist that this time with your daughter is important to her future and is strictly a mother/daughter bonding opportunity that you refuse to compromise. Surely, a Disney Dad like your partner will understand!?

SteppedOut's picture

Seriously! Tell him no. 

Who gives a $hit if he understands or not. 

No. Don't let him ruin this moment with your daughter. She will resent it and this dude (that you are leaving) is NOT worth it.

Honestly who gives a crap how it "makes him feel", he surely doesn't care about your feelings.

JRI's picture

Cuz he wants to get away from the domestic terrorists, oh, I mean his kids.  Who wouldn't?

Lillywy00's picture

Omg this makes sense. 
 

As much as he wants to delude himself into thinking he's this magnificent father, without his free house slave/concubine/bang maid/mammy, I think he has minimal interest in single parenting his kids 

Winterglow's picture

Tuff

Lillywy00's picture

Well he just got mad at me last night because as I'm looking for hotels on my phone, he came up and started looking at my phone. 
 

i closed my phone (because i am triggered that he invited himself into my peaceful hotel and probably isn't going to offer to pay for said hotel and didn't want to risk him seeing/ trying to do any "hotel planning" with me on my dime) so he got mad because I wouldn't let him see what I was looking at

THIS is why I want a weekend ALONE! Don't have time for his Drama Queen Mantrums

I hope he stays mad and refuses to go next week. 

dragonfly878's picture

I still don't think it needs to be that complicated. Why are you giving him the power of a choice? Just say no. He is not welcome on your night away with your daughter. No explatnation needed. You're both adults. You owe him nothing. No means no.

Winterglow's picture

He doesn't get to invite himself on a girls' weekend. Tell him how much he'll enjoy the bonding time with his kids without you there - lay it on thick. If that doesn't work, just tell him he isn't invited. You are allowed one-on-one time with your daughter and you seldom get it.

Lillywy00's picture

I also probably should never have told him my kid was staying in the dorm. 
 

I think his insecure ass saw that as an opportunity for me to find someone better so he insisted on turning into a stage 5 clinger. 
 

I'm going to distance myself as much as possible from him (maybe parlay on his pissy attitude) in hopes that he refuses to go, sits down, stfu and takes care of his kids like the "great" dad he claims to be. 

Harry's picture

Something we'll come up that  SK can't be left home alone .. Sink is leaking...., BM has a emergency nail problem need a overnight stay at a nail place...Free eating at Restaurants three meals a day o my .....  What we say JUST SAY NO.....  Girls weekend he's not a girl.  ...He most likely needs topics to talk to SK .......    Have a great weekend alone 

Survivingstephell's picture

Leave for your trip when he's not around.  That way he can't join you. This is supposed to be about your kid, not your failed relationship.  He puts his kids first so you get to do that also.  

Lillywy00's picture

I can't describe just how annoyed and irritated I am rn

Trying to be honest with a mf blows up in my face. 
 

Im tired of him smothering me then ANYTHING I say or do offends him. 

Like get a fucking life!!!! ....

He really needs an exorcist, *cough* I mean therapist. 

Lillywy00's picture

I told my mother about this thinking she'd give solid insight but she told me *I* am to blame for closing my phone (when he was being nosy/looking for something to argue about so he could get his narcissistic supply)
 

It's MY fucking phone. I pay the bills so I'll close it if I want. 
 

Then I'm paying for the hotel so I should decide how I want to use it/whether I want to invite. 
 

Then she said I needed to "play nice" until I'm able to leave for good. Which I kind of agree but this douch canoe is so clingy and offended by every.fucking.thing

MrsStepmother's picture

Ugh sorry your mom didn't have your back! If you hadn't closed your phone and told him what you were looking at, it would have probably resulted in a fight anyway! You're damned if you do, and damned if you don't. If you're paying for a peaceful weekend away, you should be entitled to invite or not invite whoever you want. Do you think he'll be blowing up your phone when you're away?

ndc's picture

Why are you even considering letting him come along? Tell him it's a special trip for just the two of you, whether she's staying in the dorm or not, and he is NOT welcome to come along.  You're going to leave this guy soon, so who cares if you make him mad over this trip? And if for some reason you can't exclude him, tell him he's paying for the room if he comes.  That ought to discourage him. 

Lillywy00's picture

*agreed. If he had the audacity to invite himself he needs to have the audacity to pay for the room/inconvenience for me giving up my peace n freedom

Winterglow's picture

Don't give him that possibility to tag along. Just tell him he wasn't invited and that it's a girls' weekend. What part of "no" doesn't he understand?

Stop making this more complicated than it has to be.

 

Lillywy00's picture

OKAY .... so I stood my ground and told him I intented this trip (that I paid my hard earned money towards; and which he offered zero money on) to be SOLO for me.

I'm tired of

  • his expectiations of sex, no matter how tired I am or how little foreplay/effort he puts in to actually set the mood
  • cleaning after him and his spawns when they come over
  • dressing according to his oppressive male standards
  • his bitching and moaning about every fucking thing with his miserable ungrateful ass  (I funded multiple trips and even included his kids on one of them yet he STILL complained how 'we never go anywhere on vacation')
  • Him having no boundaries (if I'm at the house, I either have to be doing something for him, with him, or for his kids (if theyre at that house - If I leave the house I get guilt tripped)
  • Being treated like a glorified house slave by him

Ex. He figures it's appropriate to interrupt me in my 'home office' to talk about this while I'm at work. Dude, just because I'm right here doesn't mean I don't have work I need to be doing so leave me alone until break time

Anyways I tried to put it in the nicest way possible ("I want time for ME" - got rebuttled with 'oh you have plenty of time after work everyday' never mind the fact SOMEONE has to clean this house every day AND I work 2 jobs sometime after my 9-5); offered a compromise of him staying just ONE night vs. two (so I can have one to myself) but he declined.

Then as expected had a full on MANtrum complete with fake watery eyes and step-kid level power sulking. 

 

grannyd's picture

~ dressing according to his oppressive male standards ~ WTF is that? Scratch one-s head

grannyd's picture

Me too, Winterglow!

A burka in public and a G-string & pasties in the bedroom?

grannyd's picture

Actually, Rags, I word a djellaba when my husband and I were vacationing in Moroco. The ones on offer were both colourful and stylish  and I enjoyed blending in with the local women. The hijab was neither required nor enforced by law so I was happily bare-headed. What I wore under my djellaba would make you blush so I'll keep that to myself. Diablo

Suffice to say that it was awfully hot in Morocco!