*Concerned and pitying look* "Oh, I'm so sorry. Was I supposed to be scared?"

High turnover rate, esp in managers, is a sign of a poorly run workplace. 

While there are incompetent women who climb the corporate ladder, there are more incompetent men who have run the country.  The reality is stupidity is less based on gender and more based on the inability to learn and grow. 

If women banded together instead of fought against each other we would be so powerful. I truly believe this.

However, time and again we seem to fight against each other instead of fight WITH each other.

She sounds like a jerk.

My experiences in the work world with women that they are backstabbers, defer to men even when "below them" in rank, and generally are unprofessional. Mainly I have been working with men, especially the past 5 plus years = very little to no personal drama. Not the best treatment at all times, but no real drama like what you described.

women can be misogynists?   You can't paint all women with such a broad brush strike.  And this country has had numerous successful female leaders.  It's not skill or competence that has prevented a female president.  It's the patriarchy and misogynists whol claim all women are incompetent.  Unfortunately people with good social and political skills but less than stellar technical and leadership skills are promoted to manager, male or female.

I thought you had a new manager? I guess not maybe?

Look,  I do think you need to accept that this job is not for you.. and I hope you have been diligently sprucing up your resume and applying for new jobs.  

If changing jobs is not an option.. then you need to play their game.. by their rules.  I recall that the issue was not as much taking "too much" pto..but that you did it without the proper permission.. and you took the time anyway..  Now, I get that you are concerned you will lose it if you don't take it.  And.. they have not been responsive with your requests for PTO. But.... it's not your job.. it's their job.. and if you don't play by their rules.. you will continue to be in these frustrating situations.  

I also remember that you tried to take some FMLA.. but that request hasn't been accepted/approved.  Again.. a job that is so toxic that you are suffering so greatly that you can't do your job well.. you should really try to find another one.  And.. you need to find one preferably before you lose this one. (sorry.. I sound like your mom.. lol)

Unfortunately, I think you have become what they believe to be a problem employee.. So, when they look at what you are doing.. they are biasing towards seeing your work as less quality production and output.  The fact that you applied for FMLA and try to take what they see as "a lot" of PTO.. as someone not committed to getting the work done.. so despite the fact that they may have a part in not having all the best tools in your hands.. they  must see others as doing relatively more/better.. so again.. it's come down to "you" are the one not up to par.

The fact you have had all this turnover in management can't help.. and probably is an indication that what the company culture promotes and encourages is not a positive experience for many people.  

So.. please get out there and see what else is available.

I speak from experience of being in a tough situation with my current employer.

I came into the company and took a lead role.. that apparentlly the other women in the group thought should go to one of the other women in the group.. a strike against me for sure and a couple of them were pretty hostile towards me about it.. it was not my fault.. how could I have known right? 

Then after a couple years we got a new manager.. and since I was the lead.. I tried to help give him information and how our department usually handled different requests.. whelp.. big mistake.. because he thought I was telling him how to do his job and he didn't like that at all.. so now I had a semi hostile coworker situation (though a few had by now accepted me).. and also a toxic manager (who was the son of one of our board of directors no less). The manager was pretty incompetent.. and failed miserably with a budget system transition... so it made perfect sense when he was promoted into an Info Tech Management position (rolls eyes).  I actually ended up getting another position outside that accounting finance area with the same company.. and have now been in that dept for almost 20 years.. a much better fit for me.. and no one resented that I got the job.

The problem in the old group was that I could never shake the resentment and it was reflected in how my work was viewed.. they thought I didn't do anything.. but it was funny to hear from one of my allies in the group that they were bemoaning how much time it took to do all my reporting and monthly time coding work... and setting up projects etc.. they didn't realize I was just quietly over there.. quickly getting my stuff done.. I didn't need to work scads of OT because I was good enough to get my job done in the time alotted.. not the same for the ones that came after me in that role.. hahaha.

But, I guess my point is that once you have the whiff of negativity on you.. it's really hard to shake it off in place.. you really will need to make a much fresher start to have a chance at changing your reputation.

I worked in a very male dominated world for a couple of decades. The women who had climbed the ladder had all done it on their own merit. There was no backbiting, no nastiness. They had nothing but my respect. Character flaws are not gender-specific.

At my last job, had two backstabbing B*tches and one passive-agressive beta-male in my department. One B was overt (foul-mouthed, arrogant & shameless) and the other B was covert (sticky-sweet gossip hag & total slacker airhead); the beta male was super-covert & played up the Dedicated Martyr role (=got praise for all the OT he "worked" but I figured out he lied on the daily about the hours he actually worked). They'd been there 20 years, 18 years, and 17 years respectively, and all three were threatened by my competence, knowledge, and the praise I received from the technical staff we supported. 

That was the 1st job I ever got let go from (Sept 2023) and I'm 51 years old - but it was a blessing because my current job ROCKS! No b*tches or *ssholes, they appreciate what I do, and (get this!) the firm is flying all employees & guest/spouse/partner to an all-inclusive resort in Cancun this Fall for 4 nights!!!!! !!

As a good friend told me during my divorce, "The comeback is greater than the setback." I'm so grateful every day to NOT be at that sh*tty job anymore!!

Know they can't do it and blame everyone else for there failures.  Something radical wrong with your company. Going throw 6 managers in 6 months .  Either giving yhen impossible assignments, or just hiring anyone who walks in the door 

I have always stipulated with my employers rather than ask.  It is muy PTO, I inform of my leave significantly in advance and I go.  When an employer fails to adhere to agreements, I force their adherance.  Not once has anyone ever engaged an HR discussion regarding my use of benefits or regarding my performance.  Except for once which was a clear incident of comanagement where a client leader violated those laws.  I did get released but without cause so the discussions on unemployment and hostile work environment were notable following that event.

I have found that as my tolerance for employer bullshit has waned as my seniority and experience has increased that being in the right is the best place to be but... does not always end the way it would be hoped.

Take care of you.