New year and already here we gooooo
So SD15 has told DH that she will be coming this weekend ( DH weekend to have her ) . The drive for DH if he leaves after rush hour traffic (after 5:30pm) is about 2 hours . Since BM has moved which has been about 4 years I think, DH has always met her around the same time which is can be a little late but the drive is a bit far . The earlier he has met BM was 7pm but with construction going on constantly he normally meets her around 8 . Within the past year of BM PASing SD there has always been a excuse as to why BM can't met DH, lying about Dr appts, vet appts, and then saying that she can't "see" at night . Yet it's weird because she can't see well enough to take SD to her later games and such. She has told DH that he need to leave at 4 or 3pm he can meet her at 5:30 because that works for her ( BM has no other children just FYI) DH has repeatedly told her that traffic leaving the city at 5 or 5:30pm is horrible and it would take him even longer to meet her and he is unable to leave at 3pm due to work and he is actually at the Dr right now which is 40 mins from our home.This is feel is gonna become yet another excuse for SD to not come because she is starting it again today. Big sigh . Also sometimes I do not leave the office until 5 on Fridays so DH liked to wait until I get home so he doesn't have to take our 3 other small children with him . DH also told her before when she was pulling this that if she wanted to meet early the. She is more then welcome to drive to our house and drop off SD. So he may have to repeat that. Is there admendment he can add to his CO to have this is writing ? It's just BS that BM picks and chooses what she wants to do and for whom. When SD was crying about going to SIL house for Xmas eve , BM sure did drive her around at night to meet DH then when Sad cried enough , BM drove her all the way to SIL house which was an hour drive for her , at night . DH even asked her if she could leave now since it's 3pm and maybe he would not hit traffic going there and she said no because SD is not ready yet !!!!!! I'm like omg we must wait on 2 little queens
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That is so annoying to be at
That is so annoying to be at the mercy of SD and BM. Full of excuses and drama and last minute planning. You can add whatever you want for an amendment to an agreement however its probably not worth the money because it isn't really enforceable anyhow and they'll just keep doing the same nonsense. The only thing I can say is she doesn't come if it doesn't work for your house. I probably wouldn't go out of the way to accommodate ridiculous driving requests
Yes the drama continues . DH
Yes the drama continues . DH was able to he home early so he checked traffic before he left and told BM that since there is not traffic ( people are still off for the holidays ) he would meet her this one time but not to expect him to do this in the further because he will have to work and traffic will prob pick back up. If BM refuses he will see about amending the CO
Yes, you can modify the custody order to give a specific
Yes, you can modify the custody order to give a specific time, or time-frame for pickups. If that is not already in the order, he should do it. In the meantime, unless the order gives a specific time, he needs to quit engaging her on this. He should tell her once, in writing, what time he will arrive, and then quit answering her communications. So sorry your new year is off to this kind of a start. How was your trip?
Right that's what I told him.
Right that's what I told him. I said you need to stop back paddling , this is exactly why they keep doing this bs. DH already told her previously the time toy could meet her and that should have been that but he keeps entertaining her and texting back and forth. He was like " well I was just at the dr and they said I need to cut the stress as much as possible because my blood pressure is high" I said yes and they are causing the stress. There's no stress if you just don't answer or tell her " I already talked about this with you. " but he left and told her this one time he will meet her because we happened to be home and there's not traffic but after this trip to expect to meet him and the normal time. Which trip ? lol I wish ! We did wanna go on a trip but it didn't happen because I didn't have the time I thought I had off
Our CO was clear.
Each party was responsible for transporting the Kid to their location. End of drama.
This gave us a notable tool in modifying the SpermClan behaviors. The norm was for SpermGrandHag to call DW to ask her to purchase the round trip plane tickets.
The Hag got pushy and DW eventually would not buy their ticket. The additional cost of a one way ticket did not matter to us. It did to them. When the Hag got shitty, it cost her. If they did not provide the outgoing ticket, the kid did not go.
What are the specifics regarding visitation transport in your CO? Read it. Enforce it to the letter. Do not tolerate any crap from BM. She surrenders SD per the CO or she gets smacked with a contempt motion. If she fails to get her kid when scheduled, so be it. BM and the kid can deal with the school regarding attendance, etc, etc, etc....
As you know, these are all
As you know, these are all games and BS. DH needs to stand his ground and stop "negotiating" according to their whims and/or deal with this through the courts--then stick with that. (Is there public transportation SD can take?)
I told DH he needs to give
I told DH he needs to give her the same energy she gives him and stand firm! She gives him direct NO when he is trying to negotiate. He agreed and told her that moving forward he will meet her at the normal time. Just ridiculous
She is playing games
What ever suits her best for that week. You must agree on a good time for both of you. Since BM is the one who movies. She has to be put out more . Drive farther.