Well DH is going to the graduation. Showing up late by himself. We agreed, that it is not in BM's best interest that I go. }:)

He is not giving her anything, I did ask. She is amazing, the two exams she needed to pass because she had D's in the class, she managed to get an A in one and a B in the other. How the hell do you fail classes all year and then get high grades on the exam?

Her GPA was a 2.2 a few weeks ago. No clue what it ended up. Well it gets funnier, she texts my husband Wed, who she has seen two times for dinner since the Christmas vacation disaster. "Can you take me to Freshman orientation for College in July?" She gave the three weekends and said her mom can't go. DH shows me the text, which he rarely does. My first thought is holy cow! Well talking it through, we agreed that the BM needed to go. This is a lot of information and besides she is paying the bills. We pay for SS and she pays for SD. No CO on this, just agreed upon. DH had me write a long list of what information I received at orientation for BS19. He called BM and told her she needed to go. She said she realized it now and she would go the weekend of the 4th of July. Great! I asked did you tell her you would go as well. He said "No I don't want to". My answer is you may want to think about it, she is reaching out and it may go a long way in your relationship. He said "no, I have a better idea." I am going to go to see my Dad. Which is great! He can spend time with his family. He knows this way, his mom, will not try and fly SD18 in to try and meddle in their relationship. I hadn't even thought of that. Clearly he has.

On a better note, she is almost gone. BM did admit to DH on the phone that she has decided to give her one semester. If she doesn't excel, she will make her come home. I will believe it when I see it. But, a mom that wasn't originally going to take her to Orientation, it kind of feels like she is starting to check out on this kid.

She is probably tired of dealing with the drama of this kid. She totaled her car a couple weeks ago. I called that a year ago. SD told DH that BM has said not another car. Maybe the Disney mom is waking up. DH and I wonder though what are her standards for the kid? 3.0, passing, what?

I think BM realized that she has to pay 13K for her 1st semester at the number one party school in our state. The only school she could get in. DH tried to talk to her at their last dinner about what classes she was taking and degree program and when does school start? Was she working to save for spending money? None of these questions could she answer. He said it was disturbing how lack of interest or prepared she is. She is only talking about all her friends that are going.

I did point out to DH that with him not going to orientation, he can not give his info to the school or sign anything that may make us responsible. This mess of her going away is all on BM.

I feel bad DH is going tonight and that it is only to sit there for two hours for a kid that didn't care enough to get good grades and he will walk down and make sure he gets at least one picture with her. I am sure it will end up on Facebook for the whole world to see and congratulate him. Congratulate him for getting her through. What a farce. BM who never told him about a single prom, doctor appt., therapy, breakups, suicide attempts, now even considered sending him to orientation for the next phase in SD's life.

Glad he is not going, glad he is going to see his parents, without me and glad I am not sitting through another long graduation ceremony. I am going golfing with the ladies tonight and enjoy the fact that I am disengaged from these toxic people. At least DH sees SD and BM for who they are. No gift for her. If he waffles on that, I will be mad. But, he is broke right now after paying 3K for SS15 to go to summer camp. So he does see that money is better spent on the kid that needs it and appreciates it. Not the kid, who will blow it partying.

On another note, BM is putting her house on the market and moving to a town away. Better than the subdivision across the street. Eventually, BM will be gone and SD18 will be at school. Time does eventually pass and this day to day drama of blending goes away. 4 fricking years later....

I know this kid will fail miserably and she will be back. But, without massive changes, not in my house. BM created this train wreck she gets to stay as the conductor...