WOW! Steptalk Drama encourages me to speak out (finally)
So I have been hovering on the outskirts of Steptalk for a few months now, reading your blogs and trying to get the general 'lay of the land' so to speak. My FDH encouraged me before to blog on here but I was extremely hesitant to put our business out there for everyone to see and judge.. but this girl! I don't know what her username was, posted earlier today about how sad and bitter all of you ladies/gentlemen are and how she is a free 23 year old with no bastard children blah blah blah.. and I was instantly PISSED! A little background on me.. I am 24 years old, have no children of my own and up until last year when FDH and I started dating, I didn't even want children.. Then, to my shock and amazement, FDH and his amazing children SS4 and SD18months wormed their way into my life and my heart and I can not imagine not having them in my life. We are taking the steps to get married and have even discussed having children of our own someday (in the far far future). We get them both every weekend as per CO unless the BM (they each have a different mother btw) has specific plans they want to do with them. We are usually very friendly and haven't had any drama between us in the past 3 or so months. It was not always this way but we have made strides to all co-parent together and be agreeable for the kids sake. We were going through an extremely rough patch when I stumbled on this site (googling step parent advice for the win) and reading the trials and tribulations of my fellow step parents helped me realize that while the road was still bumpy and that there will be hard times, my mix-match family has it very easy compared to some.. And that might only be because the children are still young, etc etc.. but I hope it's because we are all mature enough to realize fighting and drama will only diminish the kid's quality of life and give us all premature gray hairs... So TO THE POINT --> when I saw this girl on here talking so much CRAP about everyone and all the blogs, I got so angry because reading on here has helped me try to see things from FDH's perspective and I LOVE my children, it doesn't matter whether they are step or bio.. to see someone on here calling them bastards just ignites my mama bear instincts.
- JennSunnySideUp's blog
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Thanks! Don't get me wrong,
Thank you. She insulted us in
Thank you. She insulted us in a way I've never been insulted. These women here are tough, solid and hard ass bitches some times. But they have helped me straighten out a hard situation. I feel like I've found my tribe.
You are a smart young woman and I wish you well.
Thanks Anne!! I know what you
Thanks Anne!! I know what you mean!! Just read all the newest comments on that thing and she insulted me (white woman, no thanks on the wine though. Heartburn) as well as my FDH's family because they are all native american.. but you just got to realize that people like that will exist everywhere and they will always set out to make you as miserable as they are because they can't stand to see you shine while they sit in the shade.
I am actually white. With
I am actually white. With some Cherokee. But that's not the point. I said NOTHING that would make anyone know what races are mixed in my blood. And I am an extreme liberal and I am the first to call the race card when I see it. I am the FIRST to stand up for issues related to any inequality. I have lost a lot of friendships, relationships and even job promotions for being so mad when people of color or sexual orientation or gender get screwed by the system.
I had no idea that she wasn't white. I didn't even think about her race. But now I am a white lady drinking wine and I am a shit head for trying to help her just as the women here before me helped me with a very similar situation.
What you ARE doesn't matter.
What you ARE doesn't matter. It's what you DO, and the CHOICES you make.
Yep I normally ignore them
Yep I normally ignore them and watch the drama unfold. LOL
But yea I tell that to KY kids all the time no matter what you do or where you are or where you work there will always be someone that you will not get along with. There will always be someone that is a total butt head.
I totally understand that.
I totally understand that. Growing up in a blended family defintely taught me that not every child is willing or even able to get along with a new parental figure coming into their life. As I said, my steps are still extremely young so that might be why my experiences are still relatively easy.. but hopefully once the dreaded teenage years get here, it wont change too much. Some of y'all's stories have almost turned my hair white, though!!!! These BM and kids can get out of control at the drop of a hat and I have seen that first hand!! We all come from different places and situations but want somewhere to talk about it, get advice and laugh with our fellow steps