Wow I never imagined I could find a place where other SMs felt the same way I do and go through some of the same BS as I do. Awhile ago I felt like a complete bitch for wanting to disengage with my skids because of the lack of parenting on DH part, for feeling like I will never love adult skids the same as my own (how could I when they barely speak to me FFS), for feeling like an outsider when we all hang out together, I felt like it was something I was doing (wasn't trying hard enough,etc).