I work ALOT. Most of the time, I'm pretty stressed about time. I generally feel like I'm not doing anything well, because I'm trying to cram too much in to each day. I'm regularly sleep deprived. So every little thing extra feels like a breaking point. I recently talked to DH about how overwhelmed I am, and we're employing some strategies that are helping.

One thing that is hard is when the Skids make messes or do things that they clearly intend I will clean up or handle for them. They're 15 and 16, so very capable of doing most things for themselves. I know being lazy is part of the age, but  still...there are only so many hours in the day, and I literally cannot take on anything more. Meanwhile they spend every second they're not doing school work, sleeping or video chatting with their friends or indulging their hobbies.

SD15's room is right across from the hall bathroom. Every day when she showers, she wraps her body and her hair in a towel and wears them into her room. She takes them off in there, and there they stay until they get washed. She doesn't reuse them the next night; she gets fresh towels each time she showers. By the end of her week with us, there are no more towels left for anyone else who showers in that bathroom.

DH requires the Skids to clean their rooms before they return to their mother's house. At first, SD15 would gather up the towels and deposit them in the hamper in our room, on her way out the door to return to her mother's house. I put a stop to that immediately, telling her she had to wash them herself. Then the battle began. Wednesday is our trade day. So DH has to tell her to wash her towels on Tuesday, then tell her to put them in the dryer, then tell her to take them out of the dryer, then force her to fold them and put them away. Otherwise they will sit in the washer until they mildew, sit in the dryer until magically removed and folded, sit in a pile in her room. In fact, that's the only time she takes towels back across the hall to the bathroom. Each step is a battle, and DH has taken electronics away from her many times, to get her to complete each next step. If he/we fail to make her complete each individual step, all progress stops and we're out of towels (well, everyone else is. I keep towels for me and hubby stashed, or she'll take them out of our bathroom when she's out, in hers)  unless someone handles it for her, which I refuse to do. 
She has become sneaky about trying to shirk this chore. I've found towels stashed behind the door in my bedroom, or she'll put them a few at a time in the washer without turning it on, hoping they'll get washed, dried, and put away with someone else's load. I've gotten to where no matter where I find them or what stage they're at, I just put them back in her room. That includes taking wet towels that have sat in the washer 2 days, and putting them on her bed.

When DH asks her to wash anything that is not hers, like a washcloth her brother used (no joke), she throws a fit, saying "It's not my responsibility to wash other people's' stuff!" But in almost the same breath, she asks, "What's the big deal if someone (?) has to wash a few things when I forget?" DH tried to explain her logic was incongruous, but she either played dumb, or genuinely couldn't understand him.

I don't get why this is a big deal to her. Why does she need new towels for every shower? Doesn't she get tired of having a pile of damp towels in her room? Why can't she just wash them herself without us nagging, without her conniving to get out of it?  We have a similar issue with dishes, when she cooks lunch or snacks for only herself, then leaves a mess behind her in the kitchen. It really doesn't seem too much to ask, for a 15 year old to pick up after herself.

A small(ish) thing. But maddening.