So a little back history, (for those who have not followed my posts)

I have been with my SO since SD3 was 9 months old, she is now 3 and some odd months.

Since I came into the picture (especially) but even before then BM has been a absolute nightmare.

It started with her obtaining a restraining order on me with COMPLETELY false allegations in an attempt to dictate SO's parenting time. She included in the order that I WAS NOT to be present during his parenting time, even though we were living together and had been for about 6 months at that point. So I now have that on my record even though I have emails from her after the fact stating that she lied.

The past few years have just been back and forth manipulations, vindictive petty games on her part, continuously taking SO back to court to lower his parenting time (which she never wins) ect, the usual crazy BM crap.

Well this last time started a few months ago, she is trying to take him back to court YET again so she called CPS ON ME! The case was closed and unfounded OBVIOUSLY, I LOVE SD, child abuse my ass!

So when they went to mediation, and subpoenaed the CPS case worker thinking she would somehow HELP their case, well the case worker was like, "no, there was no abuse, she is obviously loved and well cared for in SO's home ect ect", and even BM's LAWYER was like, "yeah we're going to drop the CPS stuff".

So, we waited for the referrees recommendation and he said that the parenting plan they have now should stay the same, which we were fine with. Until we got a letter from BM's lawyer stating that she is disagreeing and taking this to court. fast forward to now and they are ONCE again going to mediation. It is SUCH A waste of time.

But MY issue with all this is, SD is such a sweet little girl when she is with us, which is often. We have her on a 2-4-2-4 schedule until she starts school full time in which case BM has agreed to 50/50 (which she is now backing out of and trying to lower his time to every other weekend!) when right now we have her for 2 days and nights in a row, every 4 days.

Sorry I keep rambling, anyway, SD is so well behaved with us. She knows the rules in our home she has her moments but all in all she is great and loving and a sweetie.

For the past 6 months though, everytime BM calls to talk to her she hides, if we try to get her to talk on the phone she FREAKS out and starts crying and now BM is accusing us of not letting her talk to her daughter.

WE TRY, I even threatened with no dessert to SD if she didn't talk to her mom which BM HEARD through the phone and got all pissed at ME. wth.

But this behavior isn't normal AT ALL. She loves talking to SO's mother (nana) on the phone, when SO is at work he will call and she'll talk to him no problem, just BM she FREAKS out about.

So I asked her at dinner tonight, do you want to talk to mommy after dinner?

she said noooo so I asked her why and I get "becaaause" so I asked "well mommy wants to talk to you on the phone, why don't you want to talk to her honey?

And she got all sad and teary and said "mommy yells at me"

so I asked what does she yell about?

"because I was naughty when I fell."

And thats all I could get out of her, I didn't want to push the topic

It's just so upsetting because I've seen SD with BM and she is ROTTEN. She screams and kicks and hits, BM has called SO LATE at night because SD was crying for Daddy and would not go to sleep, which is INSANE if you saw how it is at our house. She picks out a bedtime story and goes RIGHT to sleep.

I just feel like something is going on over there but I don;t want to call CPS because she has done it so many times to us I don't want it to just look retaliatory so they don't take it seriously.

I just really need some advice, this poor little girl is obviously suffering at her mothers house and we have no way of knowing what is going on. Thoughts??