This is the first time I've ever written a blog so here goes.  First of all, I'm very grateful to have found this website.  That being said, I'm also very embarrassed to mention what I've encounterd with SD38.  Generally speaking, no matter how nice I've been (& I have bent over backwards) I get the cold shoulder, no response, etc routine.  Then 2 incidents happened which have made me completely distance myself.  #1: This occurred in a church parking lot. After the service, I was walking with DH through the parking lot to our car when I hear a vehicle rev its engine loudly to my right (DH is on my left).  I look to my right and someone in this big SUV guns the engine, comes toward me, then slows down as they get way too close - it all happend so fast & when I look over I'm shocked to see SD38 behind the wheel laughing along with her husband. They took off.  My DH says, "oh, it's nothing - she's just kidding around."  It was still early in the marriage &, wanting to please him, I let it go, but a red flag went off and registered in my mind.  Then about 6 months ago (& 8 years into the marriage), incident #2:  similar scenario in a restaurant parking lot.  DH & I are meeting SD38 for her birthday lunch.  I'm crossing the parking lot and DH is again on my left.  Out of the corner of my eye, I see a big SUV make a 45 degree angle turn & head directly toward me.  I'm thinking what in the h*ll is wrong with this person when I see that it's SD38 coming closer & closer laughing once again.  I stop in my tracks wondering how close she is going to get.  She stops about a couple of inches from me.  I look over at DH who looks surprised & concerned, but takes off for the restaurant.  I was determined to stay cool even though it was extremely difficult. I did the "queen" wave, then walk slowly toward the restaurant.  I was so absolutely shocked.  We sit at the table & I was trying to wrap my mind around what just happened and refused to talk to any of them (DH, SD38, & her husband & their baby).  The adults are all acting like nothing happend.  Then DH is rambling about something regarding his daughter (SD38),  looks over at me & says, "isn't she sweet?"  Well, bust my britches.  I think I said, "yeah, sure, let's go with that" & didn't say another word to them the whole time.  I'm sorry I didn't speak up for myself at the time.  Later, I confronted DH about it and told him how upset I was that he vacated the scene and basically threw me under the bus.  I also said if she had made bodily contact with her SUV, she'd be in jail.  He told me I was making a big deal out of nothing, it was stupid on her part but not worth having a discussion/argument over, & "excuse me for having to get inside the restuarant to go to the bathroom." Later, he said it didn't happen the way I mentioned (even though he was right there & saw it all).  At one point, he said he got inbetween the vehicle and myself.  It's nuts.  I know what happened and won't be talked out of it.  Every time I've brought it up since then to see if I get any validation/apology from him (which I don't), he just marks the calendar for the umpteenth time I've brought it up.  I feel like I need therapy.  I've thought about divorce.  In general, he's very easy going, but he's got too much denial going on with regard to SD38 for me to take.  He's also an adult child of an alcoholic w/o much recovery to add to the mix, so there you go.  The good thing about COVID is I haven't seen her since & refuse to do so at this point.  But I feel like he's just as much a part of the problem as she is. Help!

After reading several other posts/blogs here, I felt so much relief and decided to join.  Thank you for reading this long blog.