I guess there isn't much you can say about her allowance if your H can afford it and it isn't affecting your household finances. If I were you, I'd use every opportunity to remind him that his snowflake is now an adult and she needs to act accordingly.

$700 for just a dress?? I didn't spend that on my wedding dress. I wore a simple off-white colored gown my mom gave to me. Maybe worth $100?? And I didn't even go to senior prom! I was working!

When his princess turns 18 the whole “since she is 18” thing will go out the window. I get it that it drives you crazy, I deal with similar with my DH. All I can do is give my opinion, but not much else.

When he loaned his son money for winter tires for a new car in November, I could only give me opinion that his son can’t really afford the car if he can’t put tires on it and that him buying the tires isn’t teaching his son how to be a responsible adult etc.
Skid has not paid one penny towards those tires and last week was claiming he was broke (after spending half his pay Cheque) on a new guitar. Daddy feels bad for him loans him another $250 because skid needs to eat. But skid bought another $350 guitar after that and a few other things. DH is not teaching his son at all and not much I can do about it except point it out.

It will affect other things like DH said if we get a revenue property he would like to offer to rent it to skid. My answer is no because he has proven not to be responsible. Buying a vacation property, skid can’t use it because he has proven not to be responsible. Consequences for raising an entitled, lying manipulator who thinks everyone owes him.

My son (who is younger and in university)never asks or expects money, once his bank card did not work and I gave him money which was paid back within 2 days. If I handed my kid money like DH did I guarantee you it would be an issue.

Remind your DH when they are 18 that they are adults just like he does to you but don’t expect it to change.

My stepkids were also coddled and had everything handed to them by BM and were rudely awakened when they turned 18 and had to get jobs. Luckily my DH put his foot down and didn't give in to their requests for money, but he thought about it. Twice my SD hit him up for a monthly allowance while in college and I said no. We have combined finances and I REFUSED to give an allowance to a grown woman so she could be in a sorority and get tattoos. It might have been different if it was for necessities but when her Instagram was full of half naked pictures of her at raves, I told him no f*cking way, I am not giving your daughter money to party. I flat out told him she'd have the money for her utilities if she wasn't going to Vegas for 3 days to dance around in her underwear at the Electric Daisy Carnival. And he knew I was right. She wanted $250 a month and I thought that was bullsh*t. She chose to go to college is an expensive city with high rent and fat tuition when she could have gone to a local school that cost half as much and lived at home. I would have been open to her living with us while in school but I still would have insisted she work to pay her own extras. But that wasn't good enough so guess what princess, you're on your own. I don't believe is supporting adults making those kinds of decisions. Her mother and grandmother enabled that nonsense, no way was I going along with it.

Do you have combined finances? If so, tell your DH no. It's your money too.if your money is separate, tell him you don't care what he pisses it away on but he damn well better pay for his own expenses first and not leave you to pick up his slack because he paid for his princess to get her nails done.

maybe DH could tell his snowflake that he will match half her income for the first year up to %450 a month. Not a cent more. So if she earns $200 he gives her $100. She earns $800 he gives her $400. When you coddle your children like this they do not automatically get those skills by osmosis in College. He needs to whittle it down every few months so she can cope on her own.

Is he well off? Not complaining about money? If he is giving her 350 for first year, is that really all the money he will give?

I mean lets say 3 months in, sd comes over you see him give her more money...will you be upset that he is doing that? Is your money seperate?

I cant offer much, because we share finances, and it makes me angry when dh drops money on big stuff without talking to me, or i hear ss whispering to dh about needing money for something. Dh complains to me about money, but wont tighten up where we should, im a cheap skate, i look for deals all the time, so it pisses me off when dh spends the full amont on ss14 who just ruins stuff, wont take care of anything.

Ss14 has a backpack, it works, one zipper pocket is broken(a pocket HE DOES NOT USE) he has told dh the last few nights, i need a new backpack- its broken- wont tell dh what is broken of course. He is getting all NEW STUFF for his first year of high school, i know dh will just drop money on him, next school year. Ss14 can wait for a new backpack but i can tell dh is wearing down!!

Its either sneaky giving skids money, or out right in your face.

Ugh he will be giving ss money forever...

I dont care if he spends money on ss, but dont come to me talking about we are tight, or we need to stop spending so much, then ya turn around and waste money....ugh

Ss14 grades are crap, ss asked about doing baseball- i mean its probably 250- 300 dollars gone, ss barely plays, and we will have to buy all new stuff as he has grown. I was talking about signing baby girl up for a toddler dance class, dh went on a rant! A rant about money. But guess who will do baseball and wont bat an eye- if he signs this lazy teen up for baseball, im signing her up for dance and buying the best dance outfits!! Yup we are adults over here..lol

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Don't stress about it, you raised your children to be productive young people, DH and BM raised a parasite.

if DH say she will only get X amount per month and nothing more, start working on him to stick to that, SO also gave Aergia a budget and she called the other day, she needs gas, she forgot her card at home blablablabla all the normal excuses, DH should e-wallet her money. I gave him a thumbs up and he said yes, when the call was over, I said simply do it from her bank account, (SO has excess to it) He laughed and said, I never thought about that, I usually just send from mine... I asked then why did you give her a budget to work from, I understand her forgetting her bank card at home and needing money, you are there to help, simply send it from her bank account, she did not ask you for extra money..

Guess what 10min later she calls and screams his ear off, how dare he using her bank account, SO told her, I did not... I send you money from your bank account, you asked for it.... then the light went on... SO: How do you know it was from your bank account that means you've got your bank card on you and you lied.... she killed the phone conversation..

I won, I knew she was playing him for a month now and he's to stupid to see it... give it another 2 months and she will inform us she found a waitress job lol...