Self Absorbed condescending adult stepson
He is almost 40 and treats him Mom (my wife) like crap. Whenever she makes a suggestion or asks about his life or business, the standard repsonse is "You don't understand". He continually boasts about his business and his money, and his life is on constant display on social media. My relationship with him is very cool, and he knows I don't approve of his attitude, but confrontation just makes things worse for the family and my wife. So I sit quietly and withdraw from most family events when he is around. I have other issues with my own son, and I don't want to keep pointing out how horrible my stepson is to my wife.. so I'm stuck. I'm afraid my passive aggresiveness and withdrawal are not helpful. I'm almost at the point of making excuses to not attend any family function.
- gshuss's blog
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Does he live with you?
Im guessing he doesnt live with you, thank God if thats true. If thats the case, all you have to do is be civil and polite. i realize he is a big irritation but I wouldn't give up family events because of this boor. I'd limit my interactions, ie, dont look at his social media, dont discuss him, dont ask questions about him. If he is boasting about his wealth, that means he won't be asking you for $. I know you hate to see him being condescing to your wife but I don't see that she is complaining.
We all have an a$$hole or two in our families, he is yours.
Welcome to the site!
If your wife wants to put up with this behaviour towards her on the part of her son - well that's her decision. He obviously doesn't try it with you because you don't tolerate it.
Nothing you can do about it.
Nothing you can do about it. And as long as he's not living with you or using your resources (time, money, possessions), consider yourself lucky.
Basic civility is all you need to muster, and supporting your wife should she decide to confront him.
I hope this isn't a case of "reap what you sow" from poor parenting, but rather a case of the guy just being a genetic jerkwad. I'm sorry for your wife.